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Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Some people think children should help with household chores. Do you agree or disagree.

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Introduction
Nowadays, some individuals think
children
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 should be encouraged to help with
household
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chores
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. I agree; it helps maintain a healthy balance within the family by creating appropriate circumstances and building independence.
Body paragraph 1
To begin
Linking Words
 with, kids who share
household
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chores
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 can manage their weaknesses more effectively and efficiently.
This
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 is because they improve their ability to concentrate and find alternative solutions to many problems.
For example
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,
children
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 can help by cleaning rooms, making their beds, and washing dishes.
This
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 will lead to responsibility in adulthood, especially in life decisions
such
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 as marriage and the workplace.
Body paragraph 2
Another important point is that
children
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 who put effort into
household
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chores
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 will improve their ability to set a vision and mission for their future.
In other words
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, they can easily see a clear plan and objectives that will help them succeed in their life.
For instance
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,
children
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 who participate in family decisions will build good habits for making personal choices,
such
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 as choosing their occupation and friends.
As a result
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, they can distinguish between good goals and bad goals.
Conclusion
In conclusion, sharing
household
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chores
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 will raise their confidence and help them become better decision-makers.
Therefore
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, I believe these points should be limited to prevent interruptions or distractions that affect their performance, especially with homework at school.

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task response
Your view is clear: you agree that children should help at home. Keep this view clear in every part of the essay.
task response
Give stronger reasons that link chores to adult life. For example, say that doing the dishes each day teaches children to be responsible and to work with other people.
task response
Some ideas do not fit the main point well. “Vision and mission” and “good goals and bad goals” are too far from housework. Use ideas such as time use, care for family, and basic life skills.
task response
Your examples are useful, but explain them more. After each example, show clearly how that chore helps the child.
coherence and cohesion
The essay has a clear start, two main parts, and an end. This makes it easy to follow.
coherence and cohesion
Make the first main point more direct. The phrase “manage their weaknesses” is not clear. Say exactly what children learn, such as self-control, care, or responsibility.
coherence and cohesion
Use simple links between ideas, such as “because”, “so”, “for example”, and “as a result”. Make sure each new sentence adds to the same main idea.
coherence and cohesion
The last sentence changes your view by saying these points should be limited. Instead, say that chores should be small and right for the child’s age, so school work is not harmed.
task response
You answer the question directly and give a clear view.
task response
You include real examples of chores, such as cleaning rooms, making beds, and washing dishes.
coherence and cohesion
Your use of “To begin with”, “Another important point”, and “In conclusion” helps show the order of your ideas.
coherence and cohesion
Each body part has one main point and an example.
Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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