IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3

The world is rapidly changing and employees cannot depend on having the same work or the same work conditions for life. Discuss the possible causes and suggest ways to prepare for people to work in the future.

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Introduction
In the past,
workers
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 tended to stay in the same Job under similar conditions throughout their lives. As some experts declare,
this
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 tendency
have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
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 changed in
the
Correct article usage
apply
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recent years. In
this
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 essay i will discuss the
posible
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possible
 reasons
underneath
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behind
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this
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 statement and make some suggestions.
Body paragraph 1
One reason for
this
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 could be how
economy
Correct article usage
the economy
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 has changed in the past decades. Nowadays we live in a much more competitive world, where only the most
profiteable
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profitable
 business
perdure
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survives
.
This
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oblies
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obliges
 companies to constantly reinvent themselves, changing the type of
workers
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 needed. As an example, there are some technological businesses that changed their production from
hand made
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handmade
 to a production made entirely by machines.
Body paragraph 2
In
adition
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addition
, there has been an evolution in people's ambitions. In the past settle in after securing an income was the norm
,
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;
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workers
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 would stay at the same position if doing so would guarantee owning a house or being able to feed their family. Nowadays, individuals want to be
be recognized
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recognised
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 and grow
proffesionally
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professionally
.
Conclusion
In my opinión,
due to
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 all these changes taking place, the folks that companies will look for are the
workers
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that
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who
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 will adapt more easily to the different jobs.
As a result
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,
i
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I
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 would recommend employees to master various specialities.

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task response
You answer both parts: you give causes and a way for workers to get ready. However, the ideas need more detail. Explain how new machines, world trade, and new work plans can change jobs and work life.
task response
Your last point is too short. Give clear ways people can get ready: learn new computer skills, keep studying, build more than one work skill, and be ready to move to a new kind of job.
task response
Use a more real example. Instead of only saying that machines do the work, show what happens to workers, such as factory staff needing to learn how to run or fix machines.
task response
Make sure every main idea is fully explained. The point about people wanting to grow at work is good, but say why this makes them change jobs or ask for better work conditions.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay has a clear order: opening, causes, and a final suggestion. To make it easier to follow, write one full paragraph for causes and one full paragraph for ways to get ready.
coherence and cohesion
Add a short ending that sums up your main message. For example: work will keep changing, so people should keep learning and be ready for new jobs.
coherence and cohesion
Use linking words with care. 'One reason' and 'In addition' work well. You can also use 'Because of this', 'For this reason', and 'As a result' to show how one idea leads to the next.
coherence and cohesion
Keep the same point in each paragraph. The first two body parts give causes, while the last part gives a solution. Make the solution part longer so the essay feels balanced.
task response
You deal with both the reasons for change and how workers can get ready for it.
task response
The idea that workers need many skills and must adapt is directly linked to the question.
coherence and cohesion
The reader can follow your main ideas because you use clear paragraph breaks and simple signposts such as 'One reason' and 'In addition'.
coherence and cohesion
Your example about machines taking over hand work helps connect changes in business with changes in the workers needed.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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