IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

Access to clean water is a basic human right. Therefore every home should have a water supply that is provided free of charge. Do you agree or disagree?

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Introduction
There is a perspective that every home should get a free
water
Use synonyms
 supply because everyone needs
water
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 to survive, and it is a basic human right. I strongly disagree with
this
Linking Words
 view because many citizens could waste their free
water
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 for no reason.
Thus
Linking Words
, I support the idea that all residents should pay for the municipal drinkable
water
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 supply.
Body paragraph 1
There is no doubt that clean
water
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 is a basic necessity for everybody to survive, but it is
also
Linking Words
 a scarce product on the planet. Most people have access to clean
water
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 because our governments hired many employees to work on making the natural
water
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 drinkable and accessible.
For example
Linking Words
, raw
water
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 needs to be collected from a natural body of
water
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 and goes through many cleaning processes before becoming tap
water
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. The whole supply system is supported by many workers and a huge amount of funds.
Therefore
Linking Words
, residents should contribute their efforts to maintain
this
Linking Words
 system as taxpayers.
Body paragraph 2
Furthermore
Linking Words
, the supply fee should be paid based on the volume of usage.
As a result
Linking Words
, people have no reason to waste any clean
water
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 and start to consider it as a precious natural resource, even though it is recyclable.
For instance
Linking Words
, if the
water
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 is free, most folks would be careless of the consumption and keep taps open even if they do not need them. The wasted volume will dump into the drain without use, which could be saved for those people who suffered of scares of clean
water
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 in a drought area.
Conclusion
In conclusion,
water
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 is a vital natural resource that needs to be protected as well. Free access to clean
water
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 for everybody is an ideal dream, but it doesn't exist in an achievable reality. I support the authority make a legislation to let users pay for their
water
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 consumption. Ultimately, the clean
water
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 can be preserved for
this
Linking Words
 thirsty crowd who have no clean
water
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 for drinking.

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task response
Your view is clear from the start and you keep the same view to the end. To make it stronger, deal with the idea of a basic right more fully. You could say that all people should get a small free amount for life and health, while extra use should be paid for.
task response
Your main points are good: water is hard to make safe, and a price may stop waste. Add more detail about how a low price or help from the state can protect poor people. This would make your answer more fair and complete.
task response
Use more exact examples. For example, say that a home may get enough water for drinking, cooking, and washing, but pay more for filling pools or watering large gardens.
coherence and cohesion
The essay has a clear four-part plan: start, two main parts, and end. Keep this plan, but make the first line of each main part state the full point more clearly before you explain it.
coherence and cohesion
Your linking words, such as 'Furthermore', 'For example', and 'Therefore', help the reader. Do not use too many cause-and-effect links in one part. Make sure each link shows the real relation between the two ideas.
coherence and cohesion
Some sentences are hard to follow because of word choice. For example, change 'the wasted volume will dump into the drain' to 'the water will go down the drain unused.' Also change 'scares of clean water' to 'a lack of clean water.' Clearer words will make your ideas flow better.
coherence and cohesion
In the last part, say your final view in one direct sentence. For example: 'In my view, homes should pay for water use, but poor families should get help to meet their basic needs.'
task response
You answer the question directly and clearly state that you disagree with fully free water for every home.
task response
The points about the cost of making water safe and the need to stop waste are useful and fit the topic.
coherence and cohesion
Each main part has one main idea, and the examples are placed after the ideas they support.
coherence and cohesion
The ending returns to your main view and gives the essay a clear close.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • basic
  • human
  • right
  • water
  • supply
  • provided
  • free
  • charge
  • agree
  • disagree
  • health
  • essential
  • sick
  • diseases
  • supports
  • education
  • children
  • focus
  • learning
  • searching
  • better
  • futures
  • reduce
  • poverty
  • families
  • save
  • money
  • spend
  • important
  • needs
  • promote
  • equality
  • chance
  • access
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