In many cities, planners tend to arrange shops, schools, offices and houses in specific areas and separate them from each other. Do you think the advantages of this policy outweigh the disadvantages?

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Introduction
There is no denying the fact that in many cities, planners used to split the
shops
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, schools,
offices
Use synonyms
and houses and put them in an appropriate spot.
While
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it is a commonly held belief that
seperate
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separating
and
arrange
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arranging
show examples
the
shops
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,
offices
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, and houses in precise places would be an
advantage
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advantageous
policy, there is
also
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an argument that opposes it. In my opinion, I consider that would be a
posotive
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positive
procedure
and
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, and
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it will help the
city
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to be more
arragned
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arranged
.
Body paragraph 1
To begin
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with, selecting a fit places for each sector will help the citizens to be more approachable to their exact
need
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needs
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.
In other words
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, any outsider will find the required place easily and without any confusion, because all the places have been
arragned appropiately
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arranged appropriately
. In
addtion
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addition
, the
retailrs
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retailers
can reach their consumers faster and vice versa.
For instance
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, if you want to buy a
moblie
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mobile
, you will immediately go to the mobile
shops
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area, and you can check and benchmark the prices smoothly.
Body paragraph 2
Another point to consider
,
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is
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the real state
one
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, one
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of the important
factor
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factors
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for every
city
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. It is
also
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possible to say that if the community know which
palces
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places
are good to rent or own a house,
this
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will support and make the people more comfortable when choosing.
Moreover
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, if the
city
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put
Correct subject-verb agreement
puts
show examples
an area for the
work place
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workplace
,
such
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as
,
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apply
show examples
schools and
offices
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,
this
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will have a significant impact on the
trafic
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traffic
and crowd of street,
it will make
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making
show examples
it more
arranged
Use the right word
organised
show examples
.
Conclusion
In conclusion, despite people having different views, I believe that
,
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apply
show examples
the more precisely you
seperate
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separate
the houses, schools,
shops
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and
offices
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in the
city
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, the more
managable
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manageable
and
control
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controllable
show examples
you will have over the people.

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Task response
Give a clearer answer to the question. Say that the good points are greater than the bad points, or say they are not. Then keep this view through the whole essay.
Task response
Explain the bad side as well. For example, people may need to travel far from home to work, school, or shops. This will make your answer more complete.
Task response
Develop each main idea more. After saying that people can find shops easily, explain why this helps daily life. Use one clear example with more detail.
Coherence and cohesion
Your essay has a clear start, two body parts, and an end. Make the link between ideas smoother. Use simple link words such as “First”, “Also”, “However”, and “As a result” in a natural way.
Coherence and cohesion
Keep one main idea in each body part. The second body part moves from home prices to traffic, so it feels less clear. Put ideas about traffic together, and ideas about homes together.
Coherence and cohesion
Make your last part match your main view. The final idea about having control over people is not well linked to the earlier points about easy access, homes, and traffic.
Language clarity
Check word forms and spelling. For example, use “separate”, “positive”, “arranged”, “appropriate”, “retailers”, “mobile”, “real estate”, and “traffic”.
Task response
You give a clear general view that planned areas can help a city work better.
Task response
The example of a mobile shop area is useful and easy to understand.
Coherence and cohesion
The essay is easy to follow because it has an introduction, body parts, and a conclusion.
Coherence and cohesion
You use some helpful linking phrases, such as “To begin with”, “In addition”, and “For instance”.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • urban planning
  • zoning policy
  • residential area
  • commercial district
  • business district
  • mixed-use development
  • local amenities
  • daily commute
  • public transport network
  • traffic congestion
  • air pollution
  • car dependency
  • pedestrian-friendly neighbourhood
  • reduce noise pollution
  • a safer environment
  • long commuting distances
  • access to essential services
  • a balanced urban layout
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