IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3

As a result of tourism and the increasing number of people travelling,there is a growing demand for more flight. What problems does this have on environment? What measures could be taken to solve the problem?

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Introduction
The issue of growing demand for more
flight
Fix the agreement mistake
flights
show examples
 because of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
tourism and the increasing
number
Use synonyms
 of
people
Use synonyms
 travelling has become a significant concern in recent years.It is widely believed that the pollution
in
Verb problem
is
show examples
 increasing
becacuse
Correct your spelling
because
 of the traffic.
This
Linking Words
 essay explores the causes of
this
Linking Words
 problem and suggests possible solutions.
Body paragraph 1
One major cause is that many
people
Use synonyms
 want to travel
at
Change preposition
during
show examples
 their
vaction
Correct your spelling
vacation
,which impact on
people
Use synonyms
 trip because it might there ruch hour and they
bacome
Correct your spelling
become
 late
to
Change preposition
for
show examples
 their flight.Another factor is that the disease will be
sparked
Verb problem
spread
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,as seen in a sick boy
wants
Correct pronoun usage
who wants
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 to travel to his family
on
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in
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 another country,the boy might cause
infactions
Correct your spelling
infections
 and
speard
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spread
 diseases.
As a result
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,many
people
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 might die
becasue
Correct your spelling
because
 of the disease,which has significant implications for the world.
Body paragraph 2
One solution is that the airport should have spesific
number
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 of
people
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 who want to travel ,which would help by
decrease
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decreasing
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 the
number
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 of
people
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 and
reduce accure
Wrong verb form
reducing
show examples
 traffic
jam
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jams
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.Another solution is that the government should
built
Wrong verb form
build
show examples
 many airports,which
has
Correct subject-verb agreement
have
show examples
 been shown to be more suitable for
Use synonyms
people trip
Check wording
people's trips
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 and to avoid the traffic .
For example
Linking Words
,if there are many
airport
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airports
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,they will not be crowded .
Conclusion
To sum up
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,
as a result
Linking Words
 of tourism and the increasing
number
Use synonyms
 of
people
Use synonyms
 travelling cause growing demand
fore
Correct your spelling
for
 more
flight
Fix the agreement mistake
flights
show examples
 is a pressing issue .By adopting the idea of
built
Wrong verb form
building
show examples
 many airports,we can address the root causes and work
tawards
Correct your spelling
towards
 a better outcome.

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task response
Focus on the environment. Your main points are about busy airports, late trips, and disease, but the question asks how more flights harm the natural world.
task response
Explain clear problems such as dirty air, gases that make the Earth warmer, noise, and harm to animals near airports.
task response
Give measures that cut pollution, not only measures that move people to other airports. For example, governments can support trains, set a tax on flights, and ask airlines to use less fuel.
task response
Make each example fit the point. You could say that more flights mean more fuel is burned, so more dirty gas goes into the air.
coherence and cohesion
Use one clear plan: introduction; two paragraphs on environmental problems; two paragraphs on solutions; then a short ending.
coherence and cohesion
Start each main paragraph with a direct topic sentence. For example: “The main environmental problem is air pollution from plane fuel.”
coherence and cohesion
Link ideas with simple words such as “First”, “Also”, “As a result”, and “For this reason”. Make sure the next sentence explains the one before it.
coherence and cohesion
Check that your ending repeats both parts of the answer: the environmental harm and the ways to reduce it. At present, it mainly repeats the idea of building more airports.
task response
You give both problems and solutions, and you try to include an example.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay has an introduction, main paragraphs, and an ending. You also use basic linking words such as “Another factor” and “As a result”.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • carbon emissions
  • climate change
  • global warming
  • deforestation
  • biodiversity loss
  • noise pollution
  • environmental pollution
  • sustainable aviation fuels
  • efficient engines
  • governmental policies
  • emissions standards
  • carbon offsetting
  • eco-tourism
  • eco-friendly alternatives
  • carbon footprint
  • carbon capture technology
  • electric aircraft
  • wildlife habitats
What to do next:
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