IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

The following maps show recent archaeological findings at historic site in the year 2004 and 2014. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

4.5 / 9
Band scoreView breakdown ↓
✍️ Want to check your own essay?Write on this topic →
The following maps show recent archaeological findings at historic site in the year 2004 and 2014. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
The maps illustrate the changes made to
historical
Correct article usage
the historical
show examples
site
Use synonyms
 during the period from 2004 to 2014.
Overall
Linking Words
,
it is clear that
Linking Words
 several new facilities were constructed in the area,
while
Linking Words
ancient
Correct article usage
the ancient
show examples
 house was expanded and added more units
in
Change preposition
to
show examples
 the
site
Use synonyms
.
Most
Correct article usage
The most
show examples
 notable transformation is the
demolished
Replace the word
demolition
 and replacement of the mountains with housing. In 2004
layout,
Correct word order
, the layout of
show examples
 the
site
Use synonyms
 consists mainly of ancient houses surrounded by mountains
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
 the northern
side
Use synonyms
 of the map. To the west, there were three
tress
Correct your spelling
trees
 around an empty space. In
2014
Correct article usage
the 2014
show examples
 map, all mountains were demolished and replaced by ancient housing.
In addition
Linking Words
, a new
toliet
Correct your spelling
toilet
 was added to the north next to ancient houses.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, a stadium
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
 and a palace were constructed
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
 the western
side
Use synonyms
 of the
site
Use synonyms
.
Moreover
Linking Words
, a tree
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
 the northwestern
side
Use synonyms
 was removed and replaced by a new stadium.
Although
Linking Words
 the ancient temple remained unchanged
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
 the southern
side
Use synonyms
, the rest of the historical area underwent significant changes.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
▼
Basic structure: Add more body paragraphs.
▼
Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words site, side with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "maps" was used 3 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "changes" was used 2 times.
▼
What to do next:
Look at other essays: