Being a celebrity, such as a famous film star or sports personality-brings problems as well as benefits. Do you think that being a celebrity brings more benefits or more problems?
✍️ Want to check your own essay?Write on this topic → Introduction
I'm
, Being a celebrity like a famous film star can
bringsWrong verb form
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more benefits.
Body paragraph 1
, famous
are more
likeCorrect word choice
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to
gotWrong verb form
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benefits because they have some value
onChange preposition
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them
like numbers of follower,Correct word order
, such as a large number of followers
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and connection that they have.
BrandCorrect article usage
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really
likeCorrect subject-verb agreement
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numbers
,Punctuation problem
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to have
kind of number
theyPunctuation problem
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always gave the superstars anything they
wantWrong verb form
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. More
experience is
famousCorrect word choice
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can
gotWrong verb form
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first line on group rather than normal
do.
Body paragraph 2
But
, the problem of being
superstarCorrect article usage
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is
theyCorrect word choice
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don't have privacy anymore. All camera all on them, they can't feel like
a Correct article usage
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normal
even
for onlyCorrect word choice
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having dinner with family.
Conclusion
In
,
BeingFix capitalization
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famous can cause some positive
for itself
,Punctuation problem
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It is like
afterPunctuation problem
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all the
has
payWrong verb form
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off, we can't see from face only
butPunctuation problem
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we should
heardWrong verb form
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another story from them.
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State your main answer in the first part: you think fame has more good points than bad points. Then give two clear reasons for this view, such as more money and more work chances.
Explain each main point more fully. For example, say how a large number of fans can help a star get work with brands, make more money, or start a business.
Your point about privacy is good, but add more detail. Explain how photos, news, and people in public places can make family time hard.
Use real and clear examples. “First line on group” is not clear. You could say that famous people may get special service at events, hotels, or airports.
Use a simple four-part plan: first part with your answer, one part for good points, one part for problems, and a last part with your final view.
Make the link between ideas clearer. Use words such as “First,” “Also,” “However,” “For example,” and “In the end.”
Keep each part on one main idea. The first body part should only explain benefits. The next body part should only explain problems.
In the last part, clearly repeat your view. Do not add a new idea such as hearing other stories from famous people unless you explain it earlier.
You answer the question and clearly say that fame can bring more good points.
You include both sides of the topic: benefits such as fans and brand work, and problems such as less privacy.
Your essay has a clear beginning, two body parts, and a final part.
The word “But” helps show a change from benefits to problems.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.