It is often considered that change is more beneficial to people than trying to avoid it and have everything remain the same. Do you think the advantages of change outweigh the disadvantages?

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Introduction
It is believed by a group of individuals that
change
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is more
friutful
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fruitful
to humans than attempting to prevent
changes
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from happening in order to remain identical every
time
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. From my personal point of view, the plus points of converting
things
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cannot overcome
its
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their
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minus points. In
this
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essay, I will try to give my own opinion and draw a conclusion.
Body paragraph 1
On the one hand, modifying
things
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around you has several strong sides based on how they influence us.
Firstly
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,
change
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makes us more engaged in an activity or a task we are doing, and it keeps us working on our way
even
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, even
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if we are bored doing the same thing
by
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, by
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changing all the
things
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up so that it
looked
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looks
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completely different from the previous
time
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.
Secondly
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, not only do
changes
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make us keep interest in a particular task, but
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also
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apply
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they
they
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also
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prepare us for various predicaments and unexpected circumstances.
For instance
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, we can utterly
change
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our attitude and approach towards a
stituation
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situation
that has never
occured
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occurred
before in our lives if we are flexible and can modify based on the situation.
Finally
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,
changes
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make us understand others' feelings and emotions when we meet mankind from diverse cultures and temperaments. Not until you are
adaptible
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adaptable
,
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apply
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can you effectively interact with individuals that vary from typical behaviours you are exposed to every day.
Body paragraph 2
On the other hand
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,
transfroming
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transforming
things
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has
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also has
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also
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some drawbacks.
First,
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constantly transforming
things
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to fit
you in
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into
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your everyday life may cause you to lose concentration. Fittingly,
this
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focus loss can affect your working capacity and make you prone to permanent pauses during a particular chore you are conducting,
while
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making you lose productivity.
Secondly
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, apart from making your focus
worse
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worse,
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changes
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take
time
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to fit
them
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in
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because
changes
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are completely
inidentical
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identical
compared to the
last
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one. Of course, suiting and living in different environments take their toll
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such
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, such
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as your precious
time
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that you allocate for yourself.
Finally
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,
changes
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make you susceptible to stress and brain fatigue. One beautiful example
to
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of
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this
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could be a
change
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from solving tests on paper to solving them on
computer
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a computer
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decreasing
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, decreasing
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your results and efficiency. So these drawbacks outweigh
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changes'
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the changes'
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strong points.
Conclusion
To sum up
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,
changes
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has
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have
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more disadvantages than advantages. In my opinion,
changes
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should be prioritised based on
individual's
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an individual's
show examples
needs and should not be changed more often.

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task response
State your view in a more direct way: change can help people, but its bad sides are stronger when change is too often or too fast. Keep this same view in every part of the essay.
task response
Explain each main point more fully. For example, say why change can cause stress, who it affects, and how this can harm work or study.
task response
Use clear, real examples. The example about paper tests and computer tests is useful, but explain why the new test form may lower results, such as less time to learn the new system.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay has a clear start, two main body parts, and an ending. However, some ideas move too fast. Give one main idea in each paragraph, then explain it before you move to the next idea.
coherence and cohesion
Use simple link words more carefully, such as 'For example', 'As a result', and 'However'. Do not use words like 'Finally' unless it is the last point in that paragraph.
coherence and cohesion
Avoid very long sentences with many ideas. Shorter sentences will make your meaning easier to follow. Also check repeated words and small errors, such as 'they they' and 'changes has'.
task response
You answer the question and give a clear personal view. You also discuss both the good and bad sides of change.
task response
You give several ideas that fit the topic, including interest in work, dealing with new events, loss of focus, time, and stress.
coherence and cohesion
The essay is well planned at a basic level: it has an opening, a paragraph for good sides, a paragraph for bad sides, and a short ending.
coherence and cohesion
Some linking phrases help the reader follow your points, such as 'On the one hand', 'On the other hand', and 'To sum up'.
Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • adaptability
  • resilience
  • stagnation
  • opportunities
  • personal growth
  • development
  • instability
  • stress
  • comfort zone
  • predictability
  • innovation
  • technology
  • quality of life
  • flexibility
  • embrace
  • transformative
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