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Writing Samples
Band 7.5

Many doctors recommend that old people exercise regularly, but patients do not follow an exercise routine. why do you think this happen ? How can people be encouraged to exercise regularly ?

7.5 / 9
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Introduction
Although
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 healthcare professionals frequently recommend regular physical
activity
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 for older
adults
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, many elderly individuals struggle to maintain a consistent
exercise
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 routine.
This
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 essay will discuss the main reasons for
this
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 reluctance and suggest several ways to encourage them to become more physically active.
Body paragraph 1
One significant reason why older
adults
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 may be reluctant to
exercise
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 is that physical
activity
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 can be particularly demanding for those who have been inactive for many years. Individuals who lead a sedentary lifestyle may become tired relatively quickly when they begin exercising, which can undermine their motivation to continue.
Furthermore
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, some elderly people may be accustomed to a less active daily routine and
therefore
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 find it difficult to establish a new habit. They may
also
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 be concerned about discomfort or injury, making them even less willing to participate in physical activities.
Body paragraph 2
There are several effective ways to address
this
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 issue.
Firstly
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, healthcare professionals could recommend low-impact activities that are appropriate for older
adults
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,
such
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 as walking, swimming and gentle stretching. Rather than expecting patients to undertake strenuous workouts immediately, doctors could encourage them to set realistic and achievable goals and gradually increase the intensity of their activities. Governments could
also
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 promote active ageing by providing accessible community-based
exercise
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 programmes.
Such
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 programmes could make physical
activity
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 more enjoyable by allowing elderly people to
exercise
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 in a supportive social environment with others of a similar age.
Conclusion
In conclusion, older people may fail to
exercise
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 regularly because they find physical
activity
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 demanding, lack motivation, and are accustomed to a relatively inactive lifestyle.
However
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,
this
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 problem can be addressed by recommending suitable forms of
exercise
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, setting achievable goals and providing accessible community programmes. These measures could help older
adults
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 develop sustainable
exercise
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 habits and improve their
overall
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 quality of life.

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Task response
You answer both parts of the question clearly. To make your ideas even stronger, add one real and clear example. For example, say how a local walking group can help an older person go out each week.
Task response
Your reasons are clear: exercise can feel hard, people may fear pain, and old habits are not easy to change. You could also say that some older people may not have a safe park, money for classes, or a friend to exercise with.
Coherence and cohesion
Your essay has a clear order: introduction, reasons, ways to help, and conclusion. Each paragraph has one main idea, so it is easy to follow.
Coherence and cohesion
Your linking words are used well. You can make the flow even smoother by sometimes using simple links such as "For example", "Because of this", or "As a result" to show the link between a reason and its result.
Coherence and cohesion
The conclusion repeats the main points well. Keep it short, as you do here, and do not add new ideas at the end.
Task response
You give clear reasons why older people may not exercise, and you give useful ways to help them start and continue.
Task response
The ideas fit the question well. Low-impact exercise, small goals, and group activities are suitable and practical.
Coherence and cohesion
The opening tells the reader what the essay will cover, and the ending brings the answer together clearly.
Coherence and cohesion
Words such as "Furthermore", "Firstly", "Rather than", and "However" help the reader move through your ideas.
Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • exercise routine = a regular plan for physical activity
  • old people / elderly people = people of advanced age
  • regularly = often and on a fixed schedule
  • motivation = the reason to do something
  • encourage = make someone feel ready to do something
  • safe = not likely to cause harm
  • gentle exercise = light physical activity that is not hard
  • support = help from family, doctors, or friends
  • community center = a local place for group activities
  • habit = something you do again and again
  • give up = stop trying
  • health check = a medical test to see if a person is well
  • active = moving and doing things
  • fear = feeling worried about danger
  • clear plan = an easy plan that is simple to follow
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