The graph below show the post-school qualifications held by Australians in the age groups 25 to 34 and 55 to 69.

6.5 / 9
✍️ Want to check your own essay?Write on this topic →
The graph below show the post-school qualifications held by Australians in the age groups 25 to 34 and 55 to 69.
IELTS Writing Task Chart for The graph below show the post-school qualifications held by Australians in the age groups 25 to 34 and 55 to 69.
The pie charts compare the proportion of Australians aged 25-34 and 55 - 69 who received post-school qualifications.
Overall
Linking Words
, the data delineates that
Auatralians
Correct your spelling
Australians
aged between 25 and 34 gained the highest number of qualifications rather than people aged 55-69.
Although
Linking Words
administration
Add an article
the administration
show examples
filed
Use the right word
field
show examples
was popular among
aged
Correct pronoun usage
those aged
show examples
between 25 and 34,
majority
Add an article
the majority
show examples
of the elderly studied engineering. Interestingly, the social sciences field represented a relatively similar
pattren
Correct your spelling
pattern
among both the age groups. To
bgin
Correct your spelling
begin
with, 347,500 Autralians who aged 25-34 received qualifications after completing their schooling,
whereas
Linking Words
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
the number of Australians
who
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
aged 55-69 showed a
little
Correct word choice
smaller
show examples
share
only
Punctuation problem
, only
show examples
104,800.
Although
Linking Words
Austrlians
Correct your spelling
Australians
aged 25-34 illustrated
slightly
Add an article
a slightly
show examples
higehr
Correct your spelling
higher
trend in the following fields
such
Linking Words
as law,
vaterinary agriulture
Correct your spelling
veterinary agriculture
, science, maths, computers, education, and
adminstration
Correct your spelling
administration
,
eldery
Correct your spelling
elderly
people
age group
Replace the word
aged
55-69
diaplyed
Correct your spelling
displayed
a
little high
Replace the word
slightly higher
share in medicine and architecture
studeis
Correct your spelling
studies
, 11.35% and 2.96% repectively. Number of Australians in both given age groups remained somewhat
same
Add an article
the same
show examples
in Social sciences and other professional fields, just
udner
Correct your spelling
under
around 20% and approximately just below 3% respectivley.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
▼
Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "although".
▼
Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 3 times.
▼
What to do next:
Look at other essays: