As the transportation and accommodation problem increases in big cities, some governments are encouraging the business move from the city to the rural area. Do the advantages of the outweigh the disadvantages?

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Introduction

Overcrowded

metroplitan

Correct your spelling

metropolitan

cities are contributing towards higher living costs.

Therefore

Linking Words

government

Add an article

the government

show examples

encourages big

business

Use synonyms

owners to move their

business

Use synonyms

to rural

areas

Use synonyms

so that

Use synonyms

accomodation

Correct your spelling

accommodation

and

transportation

Use synonyms

could

Wrong verb form

can

show examples

be more affordable. The subsequent paragraphs will provide insight into

this

Linking Words

resolution.

Body paragraph 1

Most

Add an article

The most

show examples

obvious advantage of businesses being moved to regional

areas

Use synonyms

is that

transportation

Use synonyms

becomes

Rephrase

apply

show examples

cheaper for the

employees

Use synonyms

leading

Punctuation problem

, leading

show examples

to easy approach and access to the workplace. The major issue

while

Linking Words

looking for a job is the time spent

Change preposition

apply

show examples

commuting. If commuting becomes time-effective, punctuality or even staying back can be encouraged. It may

also

Linking Words

allow potential recruitments to be enforced.

Moreover

Linking Words

, affordable

accoomdation

Correct your spelling

accommodation

plays an important role. Overly crowded cities mean less available spaces for residence

making

Punctuation problem

, making

show examples

the

Use synonyms

accomodation

Correct your spelling

accommodation

costs go higher. Rural

areas

Use synonyms

are generally

quiter

Correct your spelling

quieter

and empty whcih means

Use synonyms

accomodation

Correct your spelling

accommodation

in rural

areas

Use synonyms

should be easier and cheaper to find

resolving

Punctuation problem

, resolving

show examples

Use synonyms

accomodation

Correct your spelling

accommodation

issues.

Body paragraph 2

Moving

Use synonyms

business

Check wording

businesses

show examples

to rural

areas

Use synonyms

might be effective for

employees

Use synonyms

Linking Words

Add a semicolon

; however

show examples

however

Punctuation problem

however,

show examples

business

Use synonyms

owners might have to face

loss

Add an article

a loss

show examples

. The major drawback of

this

Linking Words

situation is reduced access to resources vital for

business

Use synonyms

For example

Linking Words

, if somebody runs the

business

Use synonyms

for ice cream production, resources required for

ice-cream

Correct your spelling

ice cream

manufacturing might be easier to access in cities than in rural

areas

Use synonyms

Moreover

Linking Words

, whether

employees

Use synonyms

are able to get to work is not a

business

Use synonyms

owner's problem. When

teh

Correct your spelling

the

contract is made with an employee, he/she agrees to deal with every hurdle that comes in the way. So affordable

transportation

Use synonyms

and

accomodation

Use synonyms

does not necessarily have any

correpondence

Correct your spelling

correspondence

with businesses.

Conclusion

To conclude

Linking Words

advantages

Add an article

the advantages

show examples

seem to outweigh the disadvantages.

However

Linking Words

, considering one perspective

i.e.

Punctuation problem

, i.e.

show examples

housing and

Use synonyms

transportation

Punctuation problem

transportation,

show examples

might not be an accurate approach towards businesses

Punctuation problem

, as

show examples

business

Use synonyms

setup is made based on

teh

Correct your spelling

the

requirements of the

business

Use synonyms

and not its

employees

Use synonyms

gaven9251

Oct 12, 2026

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task response

Give a clear answer in the first paragraph and keep the same view to the end. Your last paragraph says the good points are greater, but it also says moving may not be right. This makes your main view less clear.

task response

Explain why the good points are greater than the bad points. The essay has good points about lower home and travel costs, but it needs a stronger link to why these gains matter more than a possible loss for firms.

task response

Develop the bad side more fairly. Firms may lose staff, buyers, roads, power, or links with other firms. The ice-cream example is useful, but say which materials or services may be hard to get in a rural area.

task response

Avoid saying that travel and housing are not a firm owner's problem. This is too strong and does not fit well with the main topic. Firms need workers, so worker travel and home costs can affect the firm.

coherence and cohesion

Use one clear plan: first state your view, then one paragraph on good points, one paragraph on bad points, and finally restate why one side is stronger.

coherence and cohesion

Make topic sentences more direct. For example: “The main benefit is lower living and travel costs for workers.” Then explain this idea before moving to the next point.

coherence and cohesion

Link ideas with simple words such as “As a result”, “For this reason”, “However”, and “In contrast”. Do not repeat “Moreover” too often.

coherence and cohesion

Check spelling and word form, as errors can make ideas hard to follow: “metropolitan”, “accommodation”, “quieter”, “which”, “the”, and “correspondence”. Also use “cheaper”, not “more cheaper”.

task response

You answer both sides of the question and give a clear final view that the good points are stronger.

task response

You use a relevant example about an ice-cream firm to show how a move could make it harder to get needed things.

coherence and cohesion

The essay has a clear four-part shape: introduction, good points, bad points, and conclusion.

coherence and cohesion

You use linking words such as “Therefore”, “Moreover”, “however”, and “To conclude” to guide the reader.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
5
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
27
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

296 words

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As the transportation and accommodation problem increases in big cities, some governments are encouraging the business move from the city to the rural area. Do the advantages of the outweigh the disadvantages?

Success is often measured in terms of how much money somebody has earned. PARA 1 Do you think wealth is a good measure of success? PARA 2 How else could we measure whether somebody is successful or not?

In some countries, owning a home rather than renting one is very important for people. Why might this be the case? Do you think this is a positive or negative situation?

Some people say that to prevent illness and disease, governments should focus more on reducing environmental pollution and housing problems. To what extent do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Big salary is much more important than job satisfaction. Do you agree or disagree? Provide relevant examples if necessary.