IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

You recently received a gift from a friend. Write a letter to your friend. Thank your friend for the gift. Explain why you like it. Invite your friend to visit you. Dear Ali,

4.5 / 9
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Dear Ali, I hope you are doing well. Thanks for your gifts. I
am
Verb problem
apply
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appreciate your gift as one of my
favorite
Change the spelling
favourite
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 things.
First,
Linking Words
I liked your gift for many reasons; it
is remind
Wrong verb form
reminds
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 me
for
Change preposition
of
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 our time in primary school, it helps me to feel optimistic in
difficulties
Correct word choice
difficult
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 situations.
Second,
Linking Words
would you like to come
in
Change preposition
to
show examples
 my 30th birthday at 7:00 pm at Asia restaurant? So, we will have opportunities to tag along and get enjoyable time through discussion, watching movies, and sharing our previous experience in
Linking Words
last
Add an article
the last
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 marathon.
Finally
Linking Words
, I hope to hear from you soon Best wishes, Saif

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task response
Thank Ali more clearly and say what the gift is. Then give clear reasons why it is special to you.
task response
Make the invite more direct: ask Ali to come to your birthday, and give the day, time, and place.
coherence and cohesion
Use short, clear links such as “First”, “Also”, and “I hope you can come” to join your ideas.
coherence and cohesion
Keep one main idea in each part: thank Ali, explain the gift, then invite him.
coherence and cohesion
Use a clear ending with a full stop: “I hope to hear from you soon.”
task response
You thank your friend, give reasons for liking the gift, and invite him to your birthday.
coherence and cohesion
Your letter has a clear start, a main part, and a friendly ending.
Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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