Films and computer games which contain violence are very popular. Some people believe they have a negative effect on society and so should be banned. Other people, however, say they are just harmless and help people to relax. Discuss both these points of view and give your own opinion.

7.5 / 9
✍️ Want to check your own essay?Write on this topic →
Introduction
There is an ongoing debate about whether violent
films
Use synonyms
and
computer
Use synonyms
games
Use synonyms
should be banned.
This
Linking Words
essay will discuss both views and argue that they should not be completely banned, but children's access to them should be limited.
Body paragraph 1
Some
people
Use synonyms
believe that violent
films
Use synonyms
and
computer
Use synonyms
games
Use synonyms
have a negative influence on society. First of all, when
people
Use synonyms
are frequently exposed to violent content, they may unconsciously imitate violent behaviour in their daily lives.
As a result
Linking Words
, they may develop aggressive behaviour, which could make it difficult for them to get
along with
Linking Words
others at school or in the workplace. In the long run, they may be more likely to get into conflicts with others, which could create a more hostile atmosphere and threaten social harmony.
Body paragraph 2
On the other hand
Linking Words
, some
people
Use synonyms
think that violent
films
Use synonyms
and
computer
Use synonyms
games
Use synonyms
should not be prohibited because they are harmless and can even help
people
Use synonyms
relax. Nowadays, some
people
Use synonyms
increasingly rely on violent
films
Use synonyms
and
games
Use synonyms
to relieve stress, especially after a busy day at work.
This
Linking Words
is because
people
Use synonyms
can experience violent situations in a virtual world without actually harming others, which may help them relieve stress and improve their mood.
As a result
Linking Words
,
people
Use synonyms
may feel more relaxed and find it easier to return to work.
Conclusion
To sum up
Linking Words
,
although
Linking Words
violent
films
Use synonyms
and
computer
Use synonyms
games
Use synonyms
may encourage some
people
Use synonyms
to imitate aggressive behaviour, they can
also
Linking Words
provide a way to relieve stress. From my perspective, they should not be completely banned.
Instead
Linking Words
, governments should limit children's access to
such
Linking Words
content because children may be more vulnerable to its influence.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task response
You answer all parts of the question. To make your view stronger, explain more clearly why limits for children are better than a full ban. For example, say that age rules can protect children while adults can still choose what they watch or play.
task response
Your main ideas are clear, but they need one or two more real examples. You could give an example of a child copying a fight from a game, or an adult using a game for a short break after work.
task response
Be careful with broad claims. Instead of saying that people may copy violence, add that this may be more likely for young people or for people who watch or play such content very often.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay has a clear order: one view, the other view, then your own view. Each paragraph stays on one main idea, which makes the essay easy to follow.
coherence and cohesion
Use a little more linking between ideas inside each body paragraph. For example, after the first point, add words such as “For this reason”, “In addition”, or “This can lead to” to show the link more clearly.
coherence and cohesion
Some words are repeated, such as “violent films and computer games” and “people”. You can make the flow smoother by using “this content”, “these forms of entertainment”, “viewers”, or “players” where the meaning is clear.
task response
You discuss both sides and give a clear personal view. Your final point about limiting children’s access is directly linked to the topic.
task response
The ideas are relevant and easy to understand. The stress-relief point is explained with a clear reason: people can face violence in a virtual world without hurting anyone.
coherence and cohesion
The opening gives a clear plan for the essay, and the ending brings the main points together well.
coherence and cohesion
You use useful signposts such as “First of all”, “On the other hand”, “As a result”, and “To sum up”, so the reader can follow your argument easily.
Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Topic Vocabulary:
  • violent content
  • graphic scenes
  • exposure to violence
  • aggressive behaviour
  • desensitised to violence
  • impressionable children
  • copy harmful behaviour
  • fictional entertainment
  • separate fantasy from reality
  • a harmless form of escapism
  • relieve stress
  • personal freedom
  • a complete ban
  • age restrictions
  • content warnings
  • parental supervision
  • parental controls
  • online platforms
  • strict regulation
  • underlying social factors
What to do next:
Look at other essays: