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Band 5.5

International student exchange programmes allow students to study in another country for a period of time. What are the advantages and disadvantages of such programmes?

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Introduction
It is often argued that all
students
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 benefit from international
student
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exchange
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programmes
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.
Although
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 these
programmes
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 have some drawbacks, I believe that their advantages outweigh their disadvantages.
Body paragraph 1
One major advantage of international
student
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exchange
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programmes
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 is that they broaden
students
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’
knowledge
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. The main reason is that when
students
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 go to other
countries
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 to study, they are exposed to global issues and often take an interest in them. A good illustration of
this
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 is
that
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apply
show examples
when
students
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 from other
countries
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 come to Pakistan to study. They may
also
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 take an interest in the country's history and economy.
This
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 helps to enhance their general
knowledge
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. Another benefit is that
students
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 become familiar with other
countries
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' cultures and traditions.
Therefore
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, it becomes easier for them to adjust to different
countries
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 because they understand their social values and customs.
Body paragraph 2
However
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, there are
also
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 some drawbacks to
student
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exchange
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programmes
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. The main disadvantage is
that
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apply
show examples
the
language
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 barrier.
This
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 is because it can be very challenging for
students
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 to communicate with local people, particularly when they do not understand the local
language
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.
Therefore
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, it can be very difficult for them to live and study in a different country.
For instance
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,
students
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 who participate in
exchange
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programmes
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 in Turkey may find it difficult to communicate with local people and
students
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 because they may not speak the local
language
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. Another concern is homesickness, as it can be very difficult for
students
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 to live in a completely different place without their parents and siblings.
Conclusion
To encapsulate,
although
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 international
student
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exchange
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programmes
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 provide many benefits,
such
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 as broadening
students
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'
knowledge
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 and increasing their cultural awareness, they can
also
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 lead to
language
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 barriers and homesickness.
Overall
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, I believe that the advantages are more significant because these
programmes
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 provide long-term benefits by increasing
students
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' general
knowledge
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 and cultural awareness.

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task response
You answer both parts of the task. To make your ideas stronger, explain more clearly how each good point helps students in later study, work, or life.
task response
Your first example is not fully clear. It starts with students coming to Pakistan, but the point is about students going abroad. Use one clear example that matches the main idea.
task response
Give more detail for homesickness. For example, say that it can make students feel sad, miss home, and find it hard to focus on study.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay has a clear four-part shape: an opening, good points, bad points, and an ending. Keep this clear order.
coherence and cohesion
Some sentences are not complete. For example, write: "The main disadvantage is the language barrier." This makes the point clear and easy to read.
coherence and cohesion
Use linking words with care. You use "therefore" many times. You can also use "as a result", "for this reason", or join ideas in one clear sentence.
coherence and cohesion
Make the link between each main point and its example more direct. First state the point, then explain it, and then give one matching example.
task response
You give clear good points and bad points, and you state your own view in both the opening and ending.
task response
Your points about culture, language, and missing family are all relevant to student exchange programmes.
coherence and cohesion
Each body part has a main idea, and the reader can easily see where the good points and bad points begin.
coherence and cohesion
The ending restates the main ideas and gives a clear final view.
Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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