The government should allocate more funding to teach science rather than other subjects as it help in development of a country. To what extent do you agree?

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Introduction
In the contemporary era, the role of
education
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in driving national progress is universally acknowledged.
While
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some argue that governments should
prioritize
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prioritise
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funding for
science
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education
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over other disciplines
due to
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its direct contribution to country growth, I only partially agree with
this
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view.
Although
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scientific advancement is indispensable for economic and technological prosperity, neglecting
humanities
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the humanities
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and arts can undermine a nation's social and ethical foundation.
Body paragraph 1
On the one
hand
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, allocating substantial resources to
science
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, technology, engineering, and mathematics (STEM) is essential for modern development. Scientific research and innovation directly empower a nation to solve complex global challenges, ranging from climate change to public health crises.
For instance
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, funding medical
science
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enables the creation of life-saving vaccines and advanced treatments,
while
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investments in engineering lead to superior infrastructure and renewable energy systems.
Furthermore
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, a workforce skilled in information technology and data
science
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attracts foreign investment and fuels economic competitiveness.
Consequently
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, government backing in
science
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education
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serves as a primary engine for tangible progress and national wealth.
Body paragraph 2
On the other
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hand
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,
prioritizing
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prioritising
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science
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at the expense of other academic fields can be detrimental to holistic national development. Subjects
such
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as history, literature, philosophy, and social sciences play a fundamental role in cultivating critical thinking, cultural identity, and social cohesion. History and literature teach empathy and civic responsibility, ensuring that future leaders govern with ethical awareness.
Moreover
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, legal and policy studies are essential for maintaining justice and stable governance. A society that excels solely in technology
while
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lacking moral and philosophical grounding risks creating sophisticated tools without the ethical wisdom to manage them responsibly.
Conclusion
In conclusion,
while
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science
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education
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is a vital catalyst for technological innovation and economic growth, it should not be funded at the total expense of other disciplines. True national progress requires a balanced educational ecosystem where scientific capability and humanistic wisdom develop
hand
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in
hand
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.

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task response
Your view is clear: you agree only in part. To make it even stronger, say more directly how money should be shared between science and other subjects. For example, you could say that science needs more support in some areas, but schools should still give enough money to arts and social subjects.
task response
Your main ideas are well explained. Add one more real or more exact example, such as how a country used science funding to improve health, energy, or jobs. This would make your points feel more solid.
coherence and cohesion
The essay has a clear four-part plan, and each paragraph has one main point. To improve the flow, link some ideas inside the body paragraphs with simple words such as “also”, “because”, “for example”, and “as a result”.
coherence and cohesion
The first and last paragraphs match well. In the second body paragraph, make the link to government funding a little clearer after talking about history and literature. This will keep every sentence close to the main question.
task response
You answer every part of the question and give a clear view from the start. You explain both why science matters and why other subjects still matter.
task response
Your examples are relevant, including vaccines, roads, clean energy, and jobs in technology. They support your main point well.
coherence and cohesion
Your ideas are in a very clear order: introduction, reasons for science, reasons for other subjects, and conclusion.
coherence and cohesion
Each body paragraph begins with a clear main idea, and the ending brings both sides together in a balanced way.
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