IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7.5

The chart below shows the expenditure of two countries on consumers goods in 2010.

7.5 / 9
Band scoreView breakdown ↓
✍️ Want to check your own essay?Write on this topic →
The chart below shows the expenditure of two countries on consumers goods in 2010.
The bar chart given compares how much money was spent on five different goods in the
UK
Use synonyms
 and
France
Use synonyms
 in 2010. In general,
it is clear that
Linking Words
 in the
UK
Use synonyms
, spending on cars showed the highest figure,
while
Linking Words
 expenditure on cameras was the lowest in
France
Use synonyms
.
However
Linking Words
, spending on computers was almost the same in the
UK
Use synonyms
 and
France
Use synonyms
. Regarding the consumption of different goods,
France
Use synonyms
 and the
UK
Use synonyms
 had slightly different figures in 2010, at around £400,000 and £450,000, respectively. In terms of expense on computers, the figure for
France
Use synonyms
 was marginally higher than that for Great Britain. The difference between them was approximately £20.000 pounds. Looking at the remaining categories, the amount spent on books in the
UK
Use synonyms
 was significantly higher than that in
France
Use synonyms
, at about £400,000 and £300,000, respectively.
However
Linking Words
, consumption of perfume in
France
Use synonyms
 was higher than that in the
UK
Use synonyms
, at around £200,00 and £140,000, respectively.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, spending on cameras showed the biggest contrast between the two countries. Great Britain spent more than twice as much on cameras as
France
Use synonyms
, at around £350,000.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "however".
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words uk, france with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "figure" was used 3 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "figure" was used 3 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "showed" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 3 times.
▼
What to do next:
Look at other essays: