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Writing Samples
Band 8.5

Artificial intelligence is rapidly developing and will soon replace human workers in most industries, which will benefit the global economy. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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Introduction
It is widely predicted that intelligent machines will shortly take over the majority of jobs and that
this
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 transformation will enrich the world economy.
While
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 I accept that automation raises productivity in certain sectors, I largely disagree with
this
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 claim because wholesale replacement of people would destroy purchasing power, and many occupations depend on qualities that software cannot imitate.
Body paragraph 1
Admittedly, the case for machine-driven growth is not without merit. The most obvious point is that algorithms work around the clock without wages, holidays or errors of fatigue, so factories and offices that adopt them can produce more at a lower cost. In Morocco,
for instance
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, the Tangier car plants that introduced robotic assembly lines doubled their output within a few years, a success that attracted
further
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 foreign investment. Closely linked to
this
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 is the ability of computers to analyse enormous quantities of data, allowing hospitals and banks to make faster and more accurate decisions than any human team.
Body paragraph 2
Nevertheless
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, an economy in which most workers have been dismissed cannot flourish. The most important reason is that companies need customers,
whereas
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 unemployed citizens stop buying the very goods that machines produce. If millions of drivers, clerks and shop assistants lost their incomes at once, demand would collapse, and growth would stall. Moroccan textile towns,
for example
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, saw local trade shrink dramatically when a handful of large employers mechanised, and,
consequently
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, government spending on welfare rose sharply.
Moreover
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, teaching, nursing and creative work rely on empathy and judgment, which no program has mastered so far. In my view,
therefore
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, technology should complement people
instead
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 of replacing them.
Conclusion
In conclusion, artificial intelligence can boost efficiency in specific tasks, yet an economy run largely by machines might undermine the consumers it depends on. On balance, I believe that prosperity will come from combining human skills with automation rather than from discarding the workforce.

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task response
Your view is clear from the start: you mostly disagree. You give two main reasons, and both stay close to the question. To make the answer even stronger, explain a little more why AI may not take most jobs, not only why this may hurt the economy.
task response
Your points about lower costs, loss of income, and the need for human care are well chosen. Add one more clear link between each example and your main view. For example, say how lost jobs can also reduce tax money and slow business growth.
task response
The Morocco examples make your ideas feel real. However, they are very exact, so make sure such facts are true if you use them in a real test. You can also use a more general example if you are not sure.
coherence and cohesion
The essay is easy to follow. The first body part gives the other side, and the next body part gives your main view. This order works very well.
coherence and cohesion
Your opening and ending both clearly show your view. The ending sums up the main idea without adding a new point, which is good.
coherence and cohesion
You use linking words well, such as “Admittedly”, “Nevertheless”, “Moreover”, and “therefore”. Try not to use too many long links in one sentence. Short, clear links can make the flow even smoother.
coherence and cohesion
Most paragraphs have one clear main idea. In the first body paragraph, the point about data use is useful, but it could be tied more directly to growth with one final sentence.
task response
You answer the full question and keep a clear view all the way through the essay.
task response
The idea that firms need people with money to buy goods is strong, clear, and very relevant.
coherence and cohesion
Each paragraph has a clear job, so the reader can follow your argument with ease.
coherence and cohesion
The conclusion brings the key ideas together clearly: AI can help people, but should not fully take their place.
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