Some people think that the best way to motivate employees is to pay them more money, while others believe that other factors are more important. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

8.5 / 9
✍️ Want to check your own essay?Write on this topic →
Introduction
While
Linking Words
some managers argue that a bigger salary is the surest way to make staff work harder, others believe that respect, flexibility and a chance to grow matter more.
Although
Linking Words
both views have merit, I believe that money motivates only up to the point where basic needs are met, after which the quality of daily working life becomes decisive.
Body paragraph 1
Those who favour higher pay point first to its simplicity. A worker who struggles to cover rent and school fees cannot think about anything else, so a raise removes the anxiety that drains energy from the job. In Morocco,
for instance
Linking Words
, a textile factory in Tangier increased wages by a fifth in 2023, and absence fell by almost half within three months because staff no longer took second jobs at night. A
further
Linking Words
argument is that bonuses tied to targets give a clear, measurable reason to perform.
Body paragraph 2
Nevertheless
Linking Words
, supporters of non-financial rewards raise a stronger point for most modern workplaces. The most important thing is that once a salary is reasonable, each extra dirham buys less motivation,
whereas
Linking Words
a sense of progress keeps people engaged for years. A software company in Rabat,
for example
Linking Words
, offered its engineers one free day a month to study new skills, and staff turnover dropped from twenty per cent to six, far more than a rival achieved with a cash bonus.
Moreover
Linking Words
, employees who feel trusted by their manager volunteer for difficult tasks, and,
consequently
Linking Words
, the firm gains ideas that no payment could buy. In my view,
therefore
Linking Words
, a fair wage is the foundation, but it is recognition and development that build the house.
Conclusion
In conclusion, pay solves the problem of survival, yet it cannot by itself create commitment. On balance, companies that combine decent salaries with respect and growth motivate the best.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task response
You discuss both views and give a clear view. To make it even better, explain a little more why respect and growth can work better than pay in different kinds of jobs.
task response
Your examples are clear and help your ideas. Make sure all facts and numbers in examples are easy to trust, or use a more general example if you are not sure.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay has a clear plan: opening, pay, other needs, and ending. Keep this strong order in future essays.
coherence and cohesion
Your link words, such as “Nevertheless”, “Moreover”, and “therefore”, work well. Do not add too many link words, as your ideas already flow well.
coherence and cohesion
The last line of the second body part is strong, but “build the house” is a picture phrase. In a formal essay, you could say more directly that these things create long-term effort.
task response
You answer every part of the question. Your main view is clear: fair pay is needed, but respect and growth matter more after basic needs are met.
task response
You give useful reasons for both sides, including the need to pay rent and the value of learning new skills.
coherence and cohesion
Each paragraph has one main job, and the ideas move in a clear order.
coherence and cohesion
The opening and ending match well. The ending clearly brings together your main view.
coherence and cohesion
You use clear links between ideas, so the reader can follow your point with ease.
What to do next:
Look at other essays: