(CGPT)Some people believe it is beneficial for children to attend graduate school, while others argue that children should be given the freedom to choose their own career? Share your opinion?

6.5 / 9

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Introduction

Some

people

Use synonyms

view postgraduate study as a valuable step after university,

while

Linking Words

others believe that young

people

Use synonyms

should be free to choose their own career paths.

Although

Linking Words

further

Linking Words

education can be beneficial, I believe individuals should decide whether and when to pursue it

according to

Linking Words

their interests and career goals.

Body paragraph 1

Postgraduate study requires a substantial investment of time and money, so choosing a specialist field before understanding one's interests can be costly.

For example

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, a friend of mine studied civil engineering at graduate school

but

Punctuation problem

, but

show examples

later applied for a sales position after

realizing

Change the spelling

realising

show examples

that he wanted more interaction with

people

Use synonyms

in his working life.

Although

Linking Words

his education may still have provided useful skills, he might have chosen a different course had he understood his preferences earlier. His experience illustrates why students should have the opportunity to explore their interests before committing substantial resources to a particular field.

Body paragraph 2

Work experience can

also

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help students gain more from postgraduate education by giving their studies a clear purpose. An employee involved in an acquisition project,

for instance

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, may discover an interest in corporate finance

while

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identifying gaps in their knowledge of company valuation. A graduate program in finance would

then

Linking Words

address a specific professional need. Having encountered relevant problems at work, the student would

also

Linking Words

be better equipped to connect academic concepts with practical decisions.

This

Linking Words

connection can strengthen motivation and help students apply what they learn more effectively.

Conclusion

In conclusion, young

people

Use synonyms

should have the freedom to choose the timing and direction of

further

Linking Words

study. Those with clear goals may benefit from entering graduate school immediately,

while

Linking Words

others should be free to gain work experience before deciding which educational path best serves their ambitions.

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Nov 7, 2026

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task response

Your view is clear from the start and stays the same. To make it even stronger, say more about why some people want young people to go to graduate school at once, then show more clearly why freedom is still the better choice.

task response

Your two main ideas work well: study can cost much, and work can help people choose the right course. Add one more direct link between each idea and the need for young people to make their own choice.

task response

The examples fit your points. The first example is clear, but the second could be more personal or more exact, so it feels less like a possible case and more like strong proof.

coherence and cohesion

The essay has a clear order: opening, two main parts, and ending. Each body part has one main point, which makes it easy to follow.

coherence and cohesion

Use a few more simple linking words inside the body parts, such as “therefore”, “as a result”, or “because of this”, to make the steps in your ideas even clearer.

coherence and cohesion

The ending sums up your view well. You could make it stronger by restating the two reasons from the body parts: cost and the value of work experience.

task response

You answer the question directly and give a clear opinion: young people should choose the time and kind of further study for themselves.

task response

Your ideas are well developed and stay close to the topic. The point about work experience giving study a clear aim is especially strong.

coherence and cohesion

The opening clearly sets out both sides and your own view. The ending returns to this view in a natural way.

coherence and cohesion

Your paragraphs are easy to follow. Each one starts with a clear main idea and then gives an example and explanation.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

6.5

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 8.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

282 words

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(CGPT)Some people believe it is beneficial for children to attend graduate school, while others argue that children should be given the freedom to choose their own career? Share your opinion?

Nowadays some high-school graduates travel or work for a period of time instead of going directly to study at university. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Some experts believe that it is better for children to begin learning a foreign language at primary school rather than secondary school. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadventages?

Some people think that in modern society individuals are becoming more dependent on each other. Others believe people have become more independent. Discuss both views and give your own opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own experience or knowledge

some people say that the main environmental problem of our times is the loss of particular species of plants and animals. Other say that there are more important environmental problems. discuss both these views and give your own opinion.