IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

You are going to another country to study. you would like to do a part-time job while you are studying , so you want to ask a friend who lives there for some help. write a letter to this friend. give details of your study plans explain why you want to get a part time job suggest how your friend could help you to find a job

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Dear John, It's been a
while
Linking Words
 since we
last
Linking Words
catch
Wrong verb form
caught
show examples
 up! I hope everything is going well at your end. I wanted to get in touch because I would need a
part time
Correct your spelling
part-time
 job
while
Linking Words
doing
Verb problem
apply
show examples
studying in Canada. First of all, I would like to choose the weekends because I have
full time
Rephrase
a full-time
 Project Management
one
Check wording
course one
show examples
 year course
in the
Change preposition
on
show examples
 weekdays.
Moreover
Linking Words
, I would
be
Verb problem
apply
show examples
really appreciate it if you could search
the
Change preposition
for the
show examples
 hiring of
Software
Add an article
a Software
show examples
 Developer, as it is related to my field.
Secondly
Linking Words
, a part-time job helps me to manage my expenses
such
Linking Words
 as
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
 rent of
house
Add an article
the house
show examples
 and my
basis
Replace the word
basic
 needs.
Although
Linking Words
 I have already paid my
one year tution
Correct your spelling
one-year tuition
 fee, I want to earn the money for next year.
Finally
Linking Words
, I would be grateful if you could assist me
to provide
Change preposition
in providing
show examples
 the websites for applying
the
Change preposition
for the
show examples
 jobs because you have been living in Canada for
Linking Words
last
Add an article
the last
show examples
 five years.
Additionally
Linking Words
, I would greatly appreciate it if you could suggest
me
Change preposition
to me
show examples
about
Change preposition
apply
show examples
how I will apply online. Thank you for your time and consideration. I am waiting for
you
Correct determiner usage
your
show examples
 response. Take Care, Kamal

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task response
Give a little more about your study plan, such as the school, the start date, and why you chose this course. This will make your letter feel more full.
task response
Ask your friend for clear help. For example, ask if they know any shops or firms that need weekend staff, or if they can ask their friends.
coherence and cohesion
Your letter has a clear start, middle, and end. Use linking words more carefully. “First of all”, “Secondly”, and “Finally” can work, but each part should follow the same clear order.
coherence and cohesion
Keep one main point in each paragraph. Put your course and free time in one paragraph, your reason for work in the next, and your friend’s help in the last.
coherence and cohesion
Check some sentences so the meaning is clear. For example, write “I have a full-time, one-year Project Management course during the week.”
task response
You answer all the main parts: your study, why you need work, and how your friend can help.
coherence and cohesion
The letter uses a friendly opening and closing, which are a good fit for writing to a friend.
Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • excited
  • study plans
  • university
  • course
  • duration
  • part-time job
  • support yourself
  • financially
  • gain work experience
  • meet new people
  • suggest
  • opportunities
  • apply
  • interested
  • cafe
  • retail
  • internship
  • field of study
  • appreciation
  • eager
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