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Band 1.5

percentage of students giving good ratings for different aspects of a university

1.5 / 9
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Introduction
The given table presents
consequences
Check wording
the results
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 of surveys in 2000, 2005 and 2010 about one university.
Body paragraph 1
Overall
Linking Words
, print resources and buildings / teaching facilities account for the highest
ratings
Use synonyms
between
Change preposition
among
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 different aspects of
university
Add an article
the university
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 ,
while
Linking Words
Add an article
the
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range of modules offered represents the lowest
ratings
Use synonyms
 .
Body paragraph 2
Regarding print resources , the percentage of students giving good
ratings
Use synonyms
 increased from 84% to 89% in 2005, before decreasing slightly to 88% in 2010. In terms of building/ teaching facilities , it remained
same
Add an article
the same
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 at 77% in three different years in 2000, 2005 and 2010, respectively.
Conclusion
Linking Words
However
Punctuation problem
However,
show examples
 electronic resources accounted for 45% in 2000, before increasing significantly at 72 % in 2005 ,
then
Linking Words
 88% in 2010. Regarding
range
Add an article
the range
show examples
 of modules offered,
Correct pronoun usage
it
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represented the lowest
ratings
Use synonyms
 in three different years . In
2000
Punctuation problem
2000,
show examples
 it accounted at 32% before decreasing slightly
at 27
Rephrase
to 27%
 in 2010.

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task response
Give a full report of all parts of the table. You do not describe the rating for teachers, and you miss the 2005 figure for the range of modules. Add these key facts.
task response
Make the overview more exact. Say that print resources were the top area at first, while electronic resources rose most and became equal to print resources in 2010. Also say that the range of modules was the lowest area.
task response
Check all data words and figures. Write “fell to 27% in 2010”, not “at 27 in 2010”. Use “rose to” and “fell to” for change.
coherence and cohesion
Use a clear four-part plan: first paragraph to say what the table shows, second for the main trends, then two body paragraphs with figures. This will make the report easier to follow.
coherence and cohesion
Group data in a clear way. For example, put print resources and electronic resources together, then put buildings, teachers, and modules together. Compare figures in the same paragraph.
coherence and cohesion
Use linking words with care. “However” should show a real contrast. In some places, a new sentence or “while” would make the link clearer.
coherence and cohesion
Keep the same form for time and data: “in 2000”, “in 2005”, and “in 2010”; “accounted for 84%”; “remained at 77%”.
task response
You give a clear main view and correctly point out that print resources and buildings had high ratings, while the range of modules had low ratings.
task response
You include several key figures and describe the main rise in electronic resources.
coherence and cohesion
Your report has an opening, an overall view, and body paragraphs. The order is mostly easy to follow.
coherence and cohesion
You use some useful change words, such as “increased”, “decreasing slightly”, and “remained”.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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