IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Your local public library wants to make improvements to their services and facilities. In order to get ideas from the public, they have asked library users to send them suggestions in writing. Write a letter to the librarian. In your letter -describe what you like about the library - say what you don’t like - make suggestions for improvements

4.5 / 9
Band scoreView breakdown ↓
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Dear Sir or Madam, I'm writing
this
Linking Words
 letter
regards
Change preposition
in response
show examples
 to the request from the librarian
,
Punctuation problem
apply
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 to share my perspective on how to enhance the current services and facilities provided by the
library
Use synonyms
. I would like to mention that the current layout of the libarary is not require
to
Verb problem
apply
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change, as it
is providing
Wrong verb form
provides
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 easy access to all sections of the
library
Use synonyms
.
Moreover
Linking Words
,
i beleive
Correct your spelling
I believe
 that
newspaper
Add an article
the newspaper
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 section needs to continue in the same lobby area
as
Punctuation problem
, as
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 many readers
,
Punctuation problem
apply
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 who come to read newspapers will not take intrest to come inside
of
Change preposition
apply
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the
libraray
Correct your spelling
library
.
On the other hand
Linking Words
,
i
Fix capitalization
I
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 assume
Use synonyms
library
Add an article
the library
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 will take
neccessary
Correct your spelling
necessary
 action to
limited
Wrong verb form
limit
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 the readers
,
Punctuation problem
apply
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 who come
along with
Linking Words
 their
innfants
Correct your spelling
infants
, as it is creating
hectic
Add an article
a hectic
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enviornment in side
Rephrase
environment inside
 the premises.
However
Linking Words
, I would like to see
huge
Add an article
a huge
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 improvement on the current ventilation system as it is not cooling the back section
the
Punctuation problem
, the
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readers
Check wording
readers'
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 area in the
library
Use synonyms
 during the summer time.
Linking Words
Furthermore
Add a comma
Furthermore,
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 it would be great to see
,
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apply
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 if there are some additional sections
can
Correct pronoun usage
that can
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 be added,
specially
Use the right word
especially
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 on software engineering and artificial intelligence subjects. I'm looking forward to
see
Wrong verb form
seeing
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 these
chnages
Correct your spelling
changes
 in future. Yours faithfully, Jackson

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task response
Answer each part more clearly. Say what you like, what you do not like, and your ideas for change in separate parts.
task response
Give more clear details about the good points. For example, say why the layout and newspaper area are helpful.
coherence and cohesion
Put one main point in each paragraph. The second paragraph has both good and bad points, so it is hard to follow.
coherence and cohesion
Use simple linking words to show the order of your ideas, such as “First”, “Also”, “However”, and “Finally”.
coherence and cohesion
End with a polite closing sentence, such as “I hope you will consider these ideas.”
task response
You give useful ideas about air flow and new books on software and AI.
coherence and cohesion
Your letter has a clear opening, main body, and polite ending.
coherence and cohesion
You use some linking words, such as “Moreover”, “On the other hand”, and “However”.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • extensive collection
  • resourceful
  • helpful staff
  • friendly assistance
  • tranquil atmosphere
  • comfortable environment
  • limited operating hours
  • restricted access
  • insufficient study spaces
  • quiet spot
  • extend the hours
  • accommodate
  • private study rooms
  • cater
  • digital resources
  • e-books
  • audiobooks
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