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Writing Samples
Band 4

Some people think that only staff who worked in a company for a long time should be promoted to higher positions. Do you agree or disagree?

#people #staff #company #time #positions
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Some people believe companies should only promote those employees who has been working for a company for a long time. I am totally agreeing with those as it
give
Suggestion
gives
 workers working
in
Suggestion
with
 a company more
sense
Use synonyms
 of appreciation.
Firstly
Linking Words
, promoting ones who already
work
Use synonyms
 in a certain
firm
Use synonyms
give
Suggestion
gives
has given
 other employees a
sense
Use synonyms
 of appreciation. The reason behind
this
Linking Words
 is if companies promote their employees within its structure than it will encourage other workers to
work
Use synonyms
 hard and get promoted. It will create a
sense
Use synonyms
 of competition all among staff to
work
Use synonyms
 hard and get the desire position.
In contrast
Linking Words
, if
any business
Accept comma addition
any, business
 hire someone from
outside company
Suggestion
outside companies
 or one who just join and promoted it to a certain position it will have
negative impact
Suggestion
a negative impact
 on
employee
Use synonyms
 working for a
firm
Use synonyms
 for a long time.
Secondly
Linking Words
, an old
employee
Use synonyms
 knows much better about a corporation than newly joined
staff
Suggestion
the staff
. If a person working for past 10 years, he knows many secrets of a business and can
fulfill
put in effect
fulfil
 requirement much better than freshly joined
employee
Use synonyms
. Every corporation
have
Suggestion
has
different set
Suggestion
a different set
 of hierarchy system and old
employee
Use synonyms
 exactly knows how certain
work
Use synonyms
 can be done within the
firm
Use synonyms
. Long term
employee
Use synonyms
 may be more loyal as compared to
novice
Suggestion
a novice employee
novice employees
the novice employee
employee
Use synonyms
 as he is working long enough for the
firm
Use synonyms
. To conclude, long term staff should be given preference when
its
it is
it's
 time for promotion as it give
other
any of various alternatives; some other
another
 old and loyal
employee
Use synonyms
sense
Use synonyms
 of appreciation and
also
Linking Words
 they are more knowledgeable than newly ones.
Submitted by naumanayubibutt on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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