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Band 5

Some people believe that unpaid community services should be part of high school programs. To what extent do you agree or disagree.

#people #community #services #part #school #programs
Volunteer service rendition in communities has recently been debated. While certain groups for individual are of the view that
school
 children should be
involve
Suggestion
involved
 in village voluntary services.
However
, I disagree with
this
 considering the poor academic performance
this
 will proffer and
also
 because services to the
community
 should be optional.
on
Suggestion
On
 the one hand
,
Accept space
,
some proponent
argue
Suggestion
argues
 that
school
 children should render services voluntarily to their
community
 and I disagree.
This
 is because with
this
 kind of services,
school
 children will devote less time for their academic activities with resultant poor performance and low grades which will negatively impact on their future.
For instance
,
Accept space
,
in a study by an academic body in 2010, showed that student who were involved in
community
 services had very poor grades compared to those who did not. Seeing in
this
 light
,
Accept space
,
it is undeniable fact that
community
 services can influence the child academics and future negatively.
on
Suggestion
On
another hand
Suggestion
the other hand
other hand
,
Accept space
,
unpaid
community
 services should be optional.
This
 is because not every student cherish getting involved in
work
Suggestion
the work
 which they will have no wages for and
therefore
 should not be persuaded to do so.
Furthermore
,
Accept space
,
voluntary services by students is not necessary
since
Suggestion
for
this
 kind of services is part of punishment given to prisoners.
there
Suggestion
There
 is no need for
such
 services as it was
mend
Suggestion
mends
 for criminals. It is incontrovertible that unpaid services should be done willingly and not enforcing it on them. In conclusion,
besides
 that voluntary service to the
community
 should be optional and
also
 considering overall poor
schools
Suggestion
school
schools'
 performances of students who engaged in
this services
Suggestion
this service
these services
,
Accept space
,
i
refers to the speaker or writer
I
 disagree that volunteering services without
renumeration
something that remunerates
remuneration
 should be part of
school programs
Suggestion
the school program
school program
a school program
. I recommend that people should not be persuaded to perform
such
 services
.
Accept space
.
 It should be purely by Choice
.
Accept space
.
Submitted by akinade053 on

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    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
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    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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