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Writing Samples
Band 5

As the world becomes technologically advanced, computers are replacing people at more and more jobs. What are some job positions that may be lost because of computers? What are some problems that may result from this situation?

#world #computers #people #jobs #job #positions #situation
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People have welcomed computers as
means
Suggestion
a means
the means
 of making work easier. At the same
time
Accept comma addition
time, however
however
Linking Words
, computers have
also
Linking Words
 eliminated many jobs by making the human workers obsolete. On the one hand, the job performance of computers is often less than adequate. A number of jobs have been lost
as a result
Linking Words
 of computer technology. Human ticket agents
,
Accept space
,
for example
Linking Words
, are virtually nonexistent these days. The number of bank tellers have
also
Linking Words
 been greatly reduced due to automated bank machines. Customer service help lines are almost entirely automated. A few years ago, I worked as an assistant at a library. Today, that position doesn’t exist because the library has installed computers that do most of the same work I did. The number of positions lost to computers continues to grow, along with unemployment. While computers can easily carry out routine tasks, they often fall short when a customer has a unique request or problem
.
Accept space
.
 An automated ticket agent doesn’t have insight about an entertainment district and can’t offer friendly directions to a tourist. An automated teller machine can’t provide assistance and reassurance when a customer’s bank card has been stolen.
Besides
Linking Words
, more often than not, automated telephone operators cannot answer the one question we have and we end up waiting on line to speak to a real person anyway. In the future, I believe a new business trend will evolve. As coming
eliminate
Suggestion
eliminates
 jobs, new positions will have to be invented. More and more people will go into business for themselves and
,
Accept space
,
I hope, put the personal touch back into
business
Suggestion
the business
. I believe that the human workforce will demonstrate that it is more valuable than computers
Submitted by ritaotuya67 on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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