These days many children spend a lot of their time playing computer games but little time doing sports. Why is this? Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

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In recent years, digitization has had a severe

impact specially

Accept comma addition

impact, especially

impact especially

on children. The impact of urbanization and modernization has been very severe, and

this

Linking Words

has led children being addicted to online

video

Use synonyms

games in

favor

promote over another

favour

of outdoor sports. The essay will discuss reasons responsible for

such

Linking Words

a development along with the negative aspects pertaining to the issue.

To begin

Linking Words

with, urbanization has resulted in elimination of playgrounds from cities and towns.

Consequently

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

has resulted in

construction

Suggestion

the construction

of shopping malls and huge buildings.

Thus

Linking Words

, children do not have the necessary place to play outdoor sports.

For instance

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, a survey in Mumbai revealed that approximately 40% of open land was used for construction purposes, since the start of

millennium

Suggestion

the millennium

a millennium

In addition

Linking Words

, the security of children is another issue as parents are wary to send them outside to play. So, parents engage their children by letting them play online

video

Use synonyms

games.

However

Linking Words

, studies have shown that playing

video

Use synonyms

games for

longer time

Suggestion

a longer time

is known to have a detrimental effect on the child’s body.

Although

Linking Words

it enhances mental learning

skills but

Accept comma addition

skills, but

it has

also

Linking Words

been known to have an effect on physical and other mental activities.

For instance

Linking Words

, studies have established a clear relationship that a sedentary lifestyle leads to obesity in children.

Furthermore

Linking Words

, physical activity helps a child in the development of cognitive abilities like decision making and problem solving.

In addition

Linking Words

, sports

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also teaches

Suggestion

also teach

various other like lessons like team management, working in a group and ability to take success and failure alike. To conclude,

although

Linking Words

playing

video

Use synonyms

games

keeps

Suggestion

keep

children engaged for hours, it does not overall help in their development.

Thus

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, I strongly believe that spending too much time

paying

the act of playing a musical instrument

playing

online games is harmful for the upcoming generation.

abhisheksh14Wed Jun 12 2019

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Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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11
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
9
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

289 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

allure
captivate
supervise
accessible
scarcity
safer alternative
peer pressure
educational tools
cognitive skills
implications
obesity
poor posture
hand-eye coordination
problem-solving abilities

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These days many children spend a lot of their time playing computer games but little time doing sports. Why is this? Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Your opinion

Some people say that in our modern age it is unnecessary to teach children about the skills of handwriting. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Employers sometimes ask people applying for jobs for personal informations such as their hobbies and interests, and whether they are married or single. some people say that this information may be relevant and useful, others disagree. discuss both views and include your opinion.

Some people think that employers should not care about the way their employees dress, because what matters is the quality of therir work. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people claim that not enough of the woste from homes is recycled. They say that the only way increase make it recycling a is to for government to legal requirement