being a celebrity such as film star or sports personality brings problems as well as benefits do you think that being a celebrity brings more benefits or more problems

#celebrity #film #star #sports #personality

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?

As per the life going,

evevebody

all people

everybody

wants to became a

celebbrity

a widely known person

celebrity

or famous.

there

Suggestion

There

are

Suggestion

some

opinioun

a personal belief or judgment that is not founded on proof or certainty

opinion

opinions

I have about the same. As all know there are two

side

Suggestion

sides

have the coin.

here

Suggestion

Here

Suggestion

are

also

Linking Words

the two

seperate

act as a barrier between; stand between

separate

views one is,

whenever

Suggestion

Whenever

a person became a celebrity

firstly

Linking Words

he/ she can get more money

abously

unmistakably ('plain' is often used informally for 'plainly')

obviously

, As well as more popular, everyone wants to became his / her

selfy

your consciousness of your own identity

self

frame. Regularly he

Use synonyms

she

have the quality of being; (copula, used with an adjective or a predicate noun)

get

invited

for

Suggestion

the functions, on reality shows, he

Use synonyms

she get

chance

Suggestion

the chance

a chance

became

Suggestion

become

a headline or the maximum followers on

secial

relating to human society and its members

social

media so, who do not

wants

Suggestion

want

that? But there is an negative points

also

Linking Words

Accept space

such

Linking Words

as he

Use synonyms

she lost his

freedon

the condition of being free; the power to act or speak or think without externally imposed restraints

freedom

compair

examine and note the similarities or differences of

compare

to other people, he

Use synonyms

she will not go without security.

they

Suggestion

They

can not

cannot

use even public transport

also

Linking Words

Coz

Suggestion

the fan followers came to disturb.

she

Suggestion

She

Use synonyms

he lost his

piecefull

not disturbed by strife or turmoil or war

peaceful

life.

they

Suggestion

They

also

Linking Words

lost the costly family time

also

Linking Words

bacause

for the reason that; on account of

because

of their busy schedule. So, my thinking is that

Accept space

be a common man is good or better than the celebrity.

because

Suggestion

Because

everyone can make money, we have to decide that, where we are going to stop

Accept space

get

satisfy

Suggestion

satisfied

Submitted by deshpandeamruta25 on Fri Jul 19 2019

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

3
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
32
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.5

Complete response

4.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

7 paragraphs

187 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

Topic Vocabulary:

Public scrutiny
Intrusive
Endorsements
Sponsorships
Financial security
High-profile collaborations
Social influence
Philanthropic efforts
Trust issues
Mental health challenges
Substance abuse
Pressures of celebrity
Expectations
Disconnect from reality
Normalcy

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

6.5
band
The television is good for you. Discuss the advantage and disadvantage of watching television. Give reason for your answer and include any relevant example from your experience.
People have different views about the benefits and drawbacks of watching TV. While there are some drawbacks to watching television, I believe that watching shows usually has more positive effects.
<4
band
There are more and more effective security measures in large cities to reduce the crime. Does this endeavor bring more benefits than problems?
Since the crime rate has increased in many cities some security actions are taken to control the amount of crimes which not only can it make cities much safer places but also it can reduce the amount of crimes; Therefore in my opinion security measures can be beneficial to control cities and make them much safer despite minor inconveniences they may cause.
4.5
band
Some people think that the environmental problems should be solved on a global scale while others believe it is better to deal with them nationally. discuss both these views and give your own opinion. nb
Some people prefer to solve environmental problems on a global scale but other people think that it is better to deal each country on their own. Of course, it is better for each country to solve its own problems, but if it is a peaceful and serious problem, it is unlikely that it will be solved by itself. I believe that solving environmental problems on a global scale is better, because problem can be easily solved and unity among countries increases.
7
band
It is often suggested that schoolchildren should learn how to grow vegetables and keep animals. What are the advantages and disadvantages? Do you think that advantage of this outweigh the disadvantage?
People have different views as to whether primary schools should teach children how to cultivate plants and raise animals. While there are legitimate concerns surrounding time constraints, I believe this approach would do more good than harm when viewed through the lense of academic growth.
4.5
band
In many countries, people watch many foreign made television programs and Internet videos. The dominance of imported entertainment is harmful to the cultures of these countries. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Foreign made television programs and Internet videos are popular in many countries including Indonesia. Should they be banned in order to protect the local cultures of this country? I strongly agree with this view for a number of reasons.

being a celebrity such as film star or sports personality brings problems as well as benefits do you think that being a celebrity brings more benefits or more problems

Fully explain your ideas

The television is good for you. Discuss the advantage and disadvantage of watching television. Give reason for your answer and include any relevant example from your experience.

There are more and more effective security measures in large cities to reduce the crime. Does this endeavor bring more benefits than problems?

Some people think that the environmental problems should be solved on a global scale while others believe it is better to deal with them nationally. discuss both these views and give your own opinion. nb

It is often suggested that schoolchildren should learn how to grow vegetables and keep animals. What are the advantages and disadvantages? Do you think that advantage of this outweigh the disadvantage?

In many countries, people watch many foreign made television programs and Internet videos. The dominance of imported entertainment is harmful to the cultures of these countries. To what extent do you agree or disagree?