eating too much sugar is harmful for our health.some people think that it is government responsibility ti limit people's sugar consumption, while others think that it is an individual responsibility to limit the amount of sugar they eat. discuss both views and give your opinion

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The decreasing of people's health due to the increased consumption of
sugar
Use synonyms
,
Accept space
,
among other causes
,
Accept space
,
is a major concern these days. According to a section of people, the limitation of the amount of sweets
intaken
Suggestion
in taken
by adults and children should be limited by the government.
However
Linking Words
, others believe
that is
Linking Words
more a personal choice and people should be made aware of the risks implied by the consumption of
sugar
Use synonyms
than to impose them to eat less sugary products. I agree that the quantity of
sugar
Use synonyms
eaten by one is a personal decision
,
Accept space
,
regardless what the government states. On the one hand,
rising
increasing in quantity or value
raising
the taxes on sugary products can be a method to try to limit the ingestion of
sugar
Use synonyms
. By doing
this
Linking Words
,
Accept space
,
people would buy less treats with the same amount of
money
Suggestion
money, hence
hence
Linking Words
, they will eat less
sugar
Use synonyms
.Recent studies showed that, in the countries where the price of fast-food was risen, the quantity of junk food
decrease
Suggestion
decreases
significantly.
On the other hand
Linking Words
,
Accept space
,
choosing how much sweets one buys and eats is a private option
,
Accept space
,
regardless the price.
Moreover
Linking Words
,
rising
increasing in quantity or value
raising
the price would affect only a small part of the population.
Instead
Linking Words
, the government could promote a healthy
life style
a manner of living that reflects the person's values and attitudes
lifestyle
, offer
subsiditions
Suggestion
to gyms to encourage people to exercise more.
Linking Words
Accordingly to
Accept comma addition
Accordingly, to
researches of the
british
of or relating to or characteristic of Great Britain or its people or culture
British
science people
,
Accept space
,
advertising the danger of too much
sugar
Use synonyms
on
Suggestion
to
for
humans
Suggestion
human
health during the past few years slightly decreased the sales of sweets. Overall
,
Accept space
,
I believe it would be more efficient to find alternative methods to make people aware
by
Suggestion
of
the health issues caused by too much
sugar
Use synonyms
on a daily basis than to tell them how much
sugar
Use synonyms
to eat.
Submitted by + on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: