The only way to solve the increasing crime rate of young offenders is to teach parents better parenting skills. To what extent do you agree?

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There are three reasons why I think increasing the rate of young offenders is not only by improving parenting skills.
First
Linking Words
, societies have duties to care for teenagers. The whole of society has a duty to help prevent teenagers from committing crimes. Television shows should limit violent scenes because teenagers are easily influenced by these programs, and they are not mentally mature enough, and they will follow the examples to commit crimes.
Therefore
Linking Words
, the negative
behavior
manner of acting or controlling yourself
behaviour
does not implant to the teenagers’ consciousness.
However
Linking Words
, many shows are full of violence and crime.
Next
Linking Words
, students lack the education. If schools fail to instill them with correct
morality but
Accept comma addition
morality, but
emphasize studies repeatedly, they will gradually lose interest in learning.
Moreover
Linking Words
, schools should open law classes to help students understand what will happen if they break the law.
Finally
Linking Words
, young offenders most come from dysfunctional families. Those teenagers who live in single-parent families feel neglected and may easily develop bad
behavior
manner of acting or controlling yourself
behaviour
, and young people
can not
can not
cannot
change
such
Linking Words
as these environments. In conclusion, societies, schools, and families are very important to young people, so they should pay more attention to children.
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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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