IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 7.5

Many people assume that the goal of every country should be to produce more materials and goods. To what extent do you agree or disagree that constantly increasing production is an appropriate goals?

#people #country #materials #goods #production #goals
Many people consider that making materials and goods should be a prime target to all nations. Personally, while I agree with the viewpoint, I believe that several countries may concentrate on other spheres. On the one hand, it is undeniable that the economies of many countries will increase significantly, should the countries product products.
This
 is because they are able to export their goods to a diversity of other countries, by virtue of the international trade. China, the biggest manufacturer in the globe,
for example
, has become the
second
 biggest economic nation for many years, thanks to the production of goods.
Additionally
, the inhabitants are likely to afford various domestic products. In fact, they may buy products which are reasonably priced,
instead
 of prohibitively priced foreign products, since the indoor products have no import taxes.
On the other hand
, I think that some merits of other fields have much discussed.
First
, some countries are capable of investing funds in the
tourism
 industry. They may capitalize on the beauty of nature or the cultures of their countries to develop
tourism
. In Thailand,
for instance
, the governments focused on services and advertising of the
tourism
 destinations in order to introduce Thailand
tourism
.
Therefore
, every year, there are thousands of visitors coming to there, so the country earns millions of dollars per year.
Second
, several nations can invest in entertainment.
For example
, in South Korea, a new research showed that the nation gets about three billion dollars per year because foreigners come to there to join music shows of BTS, one of the well-known music groups in the world. In conclusion,
although
 there are many benefits of making goods to every nation, I think that other fields, including the
tourism
 or the entertainment, should be goals of many countries.

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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