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Writing Samples
Band 7

The chart below shows the numbers of male and female research students studying six science-related subjects at a UK university in 2009. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The chart below shows the numbers of male and female research students studying six science-related subjects at a UK university in 2009. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
The bar chart shows the gender distribution of
students
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 doing scientific research across a range of disciplines at a UK university in 2009. In five of the six disciplines, males outnumbered females. Male
students
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 made up a particularly large proportion of the student group who study the subjects related to inanimate objects and materials: physics, astronomy, and geology. The gender gap was particularly large in the field of physics, where there were five times as many male
students
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 as female
students
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.
Men
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 and
women
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 were more equally represented in subjects related to the study of living things: biology,
medicine
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, and veterinary
medicine
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. In biology, there were nearly as many
women
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 (approximately 200) as
men
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 (approximately 240).
This
Linking Words
 was
also
Linking Words
 true of
medicine
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. Veterinary
medicine
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 was the only discipline in which
women
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 outnumbered
men
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 (roughly 110
women
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 vs. 90
men
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).
Overall
Linking Words
, the chart shows that at
this
Linking Words
 university, science-related subjects continue to be male-dominated;
however
Linking Words
,
women
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 have a significant presence in fields related to
medicine
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 and the life sciences.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words students, men, women, medicine with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "shows" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "shows" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "approximately" was used 2 times.
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