There have been some problems with the bus servicing, especially its reliability, in your area over the last two weeks. Write a letter to the manager of the bus company, in your letter: Describe what the problems are Explain how these problems are affecting you Suggest what you would like the company to do

#bus #reliability #area #two #weeks #manager #company

Dear Sir I am writing

this

letter to formally bring to your notice that your

bus

that shuttles between Aka road and Abak road at a service route for residents in Power City Estate has really been disappointing us for the past two weeks. It is with great displeasure that I bring to your notice the tension and delay your transportation system have caused me for over two weeks now through her disappointment. It is annoying that your driver arrival the

bus

stop very late these days knowing that many of us living in

this

estate are

civil

Add an article

a civil

show examples

servant

Fix the agreement mistake

servants

show examples

and have to leave our location on time in other to beat the traffic. Not only that, every morning, they will never cease to stop by the filling station to buy fuel which ends up spending quality time on a spot because the queue is always unspeakable early hours of the day.

Consequently

this

attitude by your drivers is beginning to affect the trust I have for your service because I cannot imagine waking up as early as 5:30am and get to the office by 10am. It is unacceptable and against our company ethics.

addition

Add a comma

,addition

show examples

I have received

double

Add an article

a double

show examples

query

Fix the agreement mistake

queries

show examples

from my manager which the feedback from the

last

one was a threat for 2 weeks suspension.

Furthermore

, my

last

salary was not complete because of my lateness to work. So it is very frustrating that your

bus

service is having

this

negative effect on me. In my opinion, I will advise that your driver responsible for my route should be cautioned and let him know that my

complain

Replace the word

complaint

show examples

have gotten to that management or an alternative could be getting us a disciplined and coordinated driver.

Additionally

, your drivers should learn to fill the vehicle’s tanks in the night against the

morning to ensure

her

Correct pronoun usage

their

show examples

passengers are early at work.

Also

Add a comma

,Also

show examples

they should develop the habit of leaving their houses on time so as to arrive

the

Change preposition

at the

show examples

bus

stop timely. I hope my letter will be looked into and as well given

Remove the article

apply

show examples

due consideration. Thanks in anticipation. Yours Faithfully Njokuocha John

Submitted by emyjonel on Tue Sep 03 2019

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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

firstly
secondly
thirdly
in additional
moreover
also
for example
for instance
therefore
however
although
even though
despite

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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
10Grammar mistakes
 

8 paragraphs

353 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Greeting and closing

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 8.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

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