IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Some people think that children`s free time must include educational activities, otherwise they will waste their time. To what extend do you agree?

#people #children`s #time #activities #waste
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Overall, fossil fuels will continue to significant
energy
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 sources in the USA while natural and nuclear
power
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 has been insignificant
energy
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 sources. Petrol and oil are the most widely used as
energy
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 sources in the USA and the
energy
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 consumption of these fuels increased over the period given. It started at 35 quadrillion units (35Q) in 1980 and fluctuated in the
first
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 two decades. From 2000, it has increased steadily and expected to reach around 47Q in 2030. The
energy
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 consumption of coal and natural gas was an upward trend throughout the period. In 1980, it began at just over 15Q and 20Q respectively.
Then
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, it both has increased gradually to about 25Q in 2015. The
energy
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 consumption of coal will rise to about 30Q in 2030 while it will remain stable for natural gas.
Energy
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 from nuclear, solar
/
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wind
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 and
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hydropower
Suggestion
 started at around 4Q in 1980.
Then
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, nuclear and solar
/
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wind
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power
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 has risen by around 3Q and 2Q respectively. Consumption of
energy
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 from
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hydropower
Suggestion
 has fluctuated until 2010, and it will level out at around 4Q after that.
Energy
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 from nuclear, solar
/
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wind
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 and
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hydropower
Suggestion
 started at around 4Q in 1980.
Then
Linking Words
, nuclear and solar
/
Use synonyms
wind
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power
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 has risen by around 3Q and 2Q respectively. Consumption of
energy
Use synonyms
 from
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hydropower
Suggestion
 has fluctuated until 2010, and it will level out at around 4Q after that.
Energy
Use synonyms
 from nuclear, solar
/
Use synonyms
wind
Use synonyms
 and
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hydropower
Suggestion
 started at around 4Q in 1980.
Then
Linking Words
, nuclear and solar
/
Use synonyms
wind
Use synonyms
power
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 has risen by around 3Q and 2Q respectively. Consumption of
energy
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 from
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hydropower
Suggestion
 has fluctuated until 2010, and it will level out at around 4Q after that.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • well-rounded
  • burnout
  • informal learning
  • creativity
  • problem-solving
  • over-scheduled
  • self-discovery
  • independence
  • caregivers
  • structured activities
  • educational agendas
  • childhood simplicity
  • academic outcomes
  • professional outcomes
  • leisure time
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