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Writing Samples
Band 4.5

The graph below shows relative price changes for fresh fruits and vegetables, sugars and sweets, and carbonated drinks between 1978 and 2009. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The graph below shows relative price changes for fresh fruits and vegetables, sugars and sweets, and carbonated drinks between 1978 and 2009. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
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Given is the line graph
revealing
Wrong verb form
reveals
show examples
 information on
price
Use synonyms
 alterations of fresh fruits and vegetables, sugars and sweets, and carbonated drinks from 1978
till
Change preposition
to
show examples
 2009 in comparison with
customer-
Correct article usage
the customer-price
show examples
price
Use synonyms
index
Use synonyms
. At the onset, the
price
Use synonyms
 of fresh fruits and vegetables increased exponentially,
whereas
Linking Words
 there was a steady upturn in other products listed during the 30-year period. At the first glance,
it is clear that
Linking Words
 there were almost no differences in the cost of all categories at over $60 in 1979. Over the
next
Linking Words
 8 years, the
price
Use synonyms
 of all food products rose modestly, in spite of certain marginal fluctuations, to approximately $100
that
Correct pronoun usage
which
show examples
 was quite akin to the consumer-
price
Use synonyms
index
Use synonyms
. In the
last
Linking Words
 20-year period, increasing from $125 in 1989 to $325 in 2009, fresh fruits and vegetables were considered to be
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
 most expensive food product which is far higher than consumer
index
Use synonyms
price
Use synonyms
. When it comes to other food goods that
lower
Add a missing verb
are lower
show examples
 than
consumer
Correct article usage
the consumer
show examples
index
Use synonyms
price
Use synonyms
, it is apparent that the cost of sugars and sweets reached
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
roughly $200 in the provided
last
Linking Words
 year,
while
Linking Words
 the
price
Use synonyms
 of soft drinks accounted
almost
Change preposition
for almost
show examples
 $150

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "last".
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Introduction: The introduction is missing.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words price, index with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "almost" was used 2 times.
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