Children from 7-11 now spend more time watching television and playing video games than before. What are the effects of this on children, families and society? What are the possible solutions to this problem?

#children #time #television #video #games #effects #families #society

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Stepping into the golden era,

unbelievely

not easy to believe

unbelievably

an outstanding achievements the new 21st century

also

Linking Words

witnessed the considerable change as due to

advancement

Suggestion

the advancement

of technology all people have their own electronic devices including children. Technology

play

Suggestion

plays

indispensable role in our daily life because it helps to provide the world news at the same

time

Use synonyms

. Most of the children under the age 7 to 11 spend much

time

Use synonyms

to watch

Suggestion

watching

television

such

Linking Words

as movies, serials and playing video games on gadgets, computers and laptops. These

situation

Suggestion

situations

create many problems to the society and families. In

this

Linking Words

essay I

will discussed

Suggestion

will discuss

the valuable solutions how to solve

this

Linking Words

problem.

To begin

Linking Words

with, as every single rose comes with throne that means there are some problems which are created through new inventions

likewise

Linking Words

, in the past all

teen age

being of the age 13 through 19

teenage

went outside and play. The outdoor games like

walking running

Accept comma addition

walking, running

and so on. But nowadays, the new generation

spend

Suggestion

spends

a plethora of

time

Use synonyms

to watching television. The main problem is that they sit only one place and many diseases generate.

Secondly

Linking Words

, teachers

not provide

Suggestion

don't provide

aren't providing

the

home work

preparatory school work done outside school (especially at home)

homework

so the pupils cannot concentrate on studies.

Thirdly

Linking Words

, all the wards eat junk food,

lays

tell an untruth; pretend with intent to deceive

lies

, chips which make a lazy and illness body. It is a main reason to destroy the brain and

they

of them or themselves

their

easily lost their memory. Watching a lot of

screen

Suggestion

screens

and playing video games

affect

Suggestion

affects

the

children

Suggestion

child's

children's

eyes. Both, parents busy

Suggestion

with

job

Suggestion

the job

and they cannot give

the more

Suggestion

more time

the most time

time

Use synonyms

to the babies.

However

Linking Words

, there are some possible solutions to tackle

this

Linking Words

problem. The guardian wants to encourage offsprings to go for

walk

Suggestion

a walk

walks

and They

Also

Linking Words

motivate to play more outdoor games. In all schools

teachers

Suggestion

teacher's

teachers'

responsibility to give the homework so that adolescence spent more

time

Use synonyms

on education. All schools or institutions require to organise sports activities so that more and more teen-ager participated the games.

Moreover

Linking Words

government

Suggestion

the government

wants to appoint a social worker in all cities

Accept space

so that they aware the children and families related to the health. Government needs to build more parks and gardens in every

cities

Suggestion

city

or rural areas. So, all the juvenile or old Age people enjoy the fresh air.

Suggestion

It's

also

Linking Words

helpful to refresh the mind. On the above confabulation, as every black clouds end with silver line. If teachers and parents

tells

Suggestion

tell

the downside points than we can easily protect our children from the danger.

Submitted by simrankaur43516 on Wed Sep 25 2019

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Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
26
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

399 words

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Children from 7-11 now spend more time watching television and playing video games than before. What are the effects of this on children, families and society? What are the possible solutions to this problem?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Children are facing more pressures from academic, social and commercial sources. What are the causes of these pressures and what measures should be taken to reduce it?

In many countries, plastic containers have become more common than ever and are used by many food and drink companies. Do you think the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

The topic of renewable energy is widely discussed these days. What are the main reasons behind the increasing use of renewable energy sources, and is this trend a positive or negative development for the environment?

Some pople think that wild animals should not be kept in Zoos. Others, believe that there are good reasons of having Zoos. Discuss both views and give your opinion.