Nowadays many children are playing computer games instead of doing sports activities. why is it happening? is it a negative or positive development?

#children #computer #games #sports #activities #development

Today majority

Suggestion

Today the majority

The today majority

of children spend their free time playing games on

computer

Suggestion

the computer

instead

of doing physical activities. It is because the modern

technology especially

Accept comma addition

technology, especially

computer

video games have completely controlled the activities of children. I believe

this

is impacting their life negatively and it is definitely not a positive development. Technology has no doubt made our lives quite easier than

before but

Accept comma addition

before, but

it has negatively changed the lifestyles and activities of young ones. I think it is

also

happening due to the

neglegence

failure to act with the prudence that a reasonable person would exercise under the same circumstances

negligence

of parents towards their children. These days most of the parents

do not put

Suggestion

are not putting

any extra effort to encourage their children to participate in sports activities or propel and motivate them to indulge in physical games

such

as cycling, swimming, running, etc.

In addition

, if parents will focus more

on sports

Accept comma addition

on, sports

activities than virtual games and educate their children about the importance of participating in sports activities and set certain timings for using

computer

Suggestion

a computer

computers

the computer

then

many positive changes can be seen in the development of their children. It is observed almost

every where

to or in any or all places

everywhere

that now children have entirely lost touch with outdoor sports activities and unfortunately spend most of their valuable time wasting on

computer

Suggestion

computers

the computer

a computer

and

ipad

Suggestion

iPad

games that are useless and adding nothing useful for their mental and physical development. According to the recent survey, about 80% of school going children are addicted to playing games on

computer

and digital devices at home.

Moreover

, children who play outdoor games and participate in sports have

stronger body

Suggestion

a stronger body

and healthier brain than those children who have sadly turned into couch potatoes and prefer playing indoor digital games on PC and sit for long hours at one place without any body movement. To sum up, Parents should try to keep an eye on daily routine and activities of their children and should not merely rely on technology. Computers should be used by children adequately to avoid playing on it excessively. In order to have a healthy mind and body children need to be constantly encouraged to perform sports activities which are beneficial for their mental and physical growth.

Fri Nov 01 2019

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Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
12Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

349 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

6.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Nowadays many children are playing computer games instead of doing sports activities. why is it happening? is it a negative or positive development?

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

In many countries, a small number of people earn extremely high salaries. Some people believe that this is good for the country, but others think that governments should not allow salaries above a certain level. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Nowadays the differences between countries are becoming less evident because people follow the same media. Do the advantages of this trend outweigh the disadvantages?

You should spend about 20 minutes on this task. You have recently started work in a new company. Write a letter to an English-speaking friend. In your letter, •explain why you changed jobs •describe your new job •tell him / her your other news

Some people are born to be a leadership others believe that leadership can be learned. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

An increasing number of professional, such as teachers and doctors are leaving their own poorer countries to work in developed countries. What are the reasons for this trend? What effect does it have on the countries professionals are leaving?