some people believe that it is best to accept a bad situation such as an unsatisfactory job or shortage of money others argue that it is better to try and improve such situation discuss both views and give your own opinion

#people #situation #job #shortage #money

It is often said that people who are suffering from a lack of money

willing

Add a missing verb

are willing

show examples

to stay in the same circumstance and they do not attempt any achievements.

However

, the issue is not entirely straightforward and arguments can

also

be made against the idea.

This

essay will discuss the debate and give a concluding view. On the one hand, those who support the acceptance of the current status cite the various reasons for

this

idea. They don't want to change their constant

life

and they

preferred

Wrong verb form

prefer

show examples

to have a stable income. These kinds of people have fears of losing their jobs and

consequently

, their confidence in their

life

As a result

, they find it difficult to pursue their dreams. Another argument is that

this

type of person usually has huge pecuniary burdens on their shoulders.

Such

as bank debt or monthly family expenditure. To protect their current conditions and not

facing

Wrong verb form

face

show examples

any challenges in their

life

they would rather be satisfied with

this

position. To the supporters of the idea, these reasons are convincing. Having said that, the opponent of

this

viewpoint out that we have a chance

Change preposition

show examples

life

in the global only once and we deserve to have the best.

Therefore

they

continuing

Wrong verb form

continue

show examples

expanding their abilities and

enhance

Wrong verb form

enhancing

show examples

their lives at a higher quality level and they never give up.

Besides

this

type of individual has big

ambition

Fix the agreement mistake

ambitions

show examples

about a career path

as well as

income. By

this

, I mean that, if their current job cannot give them a new experience and high promotion or salary, they will not hesitate to leave those companies.

This

argument

also

appears to be

quiet

Correct your spelling

quite

show examples

powerful.

Overall

, I would tend to side with the opponent of

this

subject.

Although

many people have an acceptable attitude in their current lives it seems advisable to remove obstacles with strong support and can overcome any tough challenges.

Mon Nov 04 2019

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence cohesion

Improve the structure of your essay by organizing your ideas in a more logical sequence. Make sure to have a clear introduction, body paragraphs addressing the prompt, and a conclusion.

task achievement

You have provided a fair response to the task but try to focus on fully addressing all parts of the question. Make sure your examples and ideas are relevant and clearly support your arguments.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Do you want to check your IELTS essays?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

11Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

312 words

4.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 checks
Get all the feedback you need to keep improving your charts and letters.
Unlimited Task 2 checks
Practice and perfect your skills with essays.
Personalized suggestions
Know how to boost your score.
Detailed mistakes analysis
Get instant feedback. Spot every mistake.
Topic ideas generator
Get topic-specific ideas to enhance your writing.
Vocabulary helper
Get the right words for any topic.
Progress tracking
Track your writing improvements.

Topic Vocabulary:

Contentment
Resilience
Personal growth
Endurance
Initiative
Advancement
Catalyst
Financial stability
Status quo
Innovation
Missed opportunities
Life satisfaction
Adverse situations
Taking control
Risk assessment
Change management
Self-improvement
Motivation
Stagnation
Proactivity

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

5
band
Many students find it difficult to concentrate or pay attention at school. What are the reasons? What could be done?
In modern society, many coed encounter the problem of rapidly losing concentration during lectures and experiencing inattention while doing exercises. This essay will discuss the reasons for and present my own perspective on the given statement, with relevant examples and explanations outlined.
6.5
band
Write about the following topic: Some people believe that teaching children at home is best for a child’s development while others think that it is important for children to go to school. Discuss the advantages of both methods and give your own opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Education plays an important role in shaping the future careers of children. While some people argue that the best place for children development to gain their education is in their homes, I am with those who believe that school has several benefits for children.
6
band
Minority languages Several languages are in danger of extinction because they are spoken by very small numbers of people. some people say that governments should spend public money on saving these languages, while others believe that would be a waste of money. Discuss both these views and give your opinion.
Multiple languages are facing extinction because extremely small numbers of people communicate with them. Some people argue the government should use taxes to prevent them from disappearing. From my perspective, I disagree with it because it wastes public resources and the extinction of certain languages is inevitable.
6.5
band
Some people who have been in prison become good citizens later. Some people think that they are the best people to talk to school students about the danger of crime committing. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Some people believe that several convicts who have been in prison for a while are good citizens now and, they are a good choice to talk to pupils about offences. I personally partially agree with this statement and I guess this activity might be beneficial or dangerous. In this essay, I will argue my opinion.
8
band
In some areas of the US, a 'curfew' is imposed, in which teenagers are not allowed to be out of doors after a particular time at night unless they are accompanied by an adult. What is your opinion about this?
Setting a curfew exists in a certain region of the US that restricts teenagers from going out at late hours only if they are not accompanied by an adult.I think that there are some root reasons for this action.It has pros and cons.This essay will discuss both views.

some people believe that it is best to accept a bad situation such as an unsatisfactory job or shortage of money others argue that it is better to try and improve such situation discuss both views and give your own opinion

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Many students find it difficult to concentrate or pay attention at school. What are the reasons? What could be done?

Some people who have been in prison become good citizens later. Some people think that they are the best people to talk to school students about the danger of crime committing. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

In some areas of the US, a 'curfew' is imposed, in which teenagers are not allowed to be out of doors after a particular time at night unless they are accompanied by an adult. What is your opinion about this?