IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

In many cities today, most people live in large apartment blocks. Does this kind of accommodation have more advantages or disadvantages?

#cities #people #apartment #blocks #accommodation
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The majority of the citizens in cities across the country are willing to opt for
life
Suggestion
live
 in high-rise
apartment
Use synonyms
 buildings rather than small individual houses.
This
Linking Words
 essay will throw some light on both advantages and disadvantages and provides an opinion.
Firstly
Linking Words
, life in a large
apartment
Use synonyms
 building has considerable advantages like better city planning and makes maintenance of the community
easy
Suggestion
easier
. A recent study shows the city has to grow in vertical rather than horizontal to avoid long-distance travel and high maintenance.
For instance
Linking Words
, a 20 acres land can cater
to
Suggestion
for
 2000 families altogether, if the high rise apartments are built. Whereas, it needs more than 100 acres of land to build individual houses.
Secondly
Linking Words
, a high rise
apartment
Use synonyms
 culture is more safe and secure as the responsibility is taken up by the community welfare association.
Also
Linking Words
, it exposes children to other cultures and traditions to
analyze
consider in detail and subject to an analysis in order to discover essential features or meaning
analyse
 and understand society faster.
For example
Linking Words
, different age groups of people come together to spend time participating in their respective areas of interests like outdoor sports, swimming, parks and jogging tracks, as all these amenities are being built as part of the community offering.
On the other hand
Linking Words
,
this
Linking Words
 culture
also
Linking Words
 has its own demerits like creating water scarcity and an increase in pollution. As discussed, a large number of families can be accommodated in the lesser landscape area, leads to scarcity of water supply as it consumes more groundwater.
Moreover
Linking Words
, pollution increases beyond normal levels as the area gets
densified
Suggestion
. In conclusion, life in a high rise
apartment
Use synonyms
 block has more advantages over disadvantages.
However
Linking Words
, in my opinion, the disadvantages can overcome with better strategies.
Submitted by eshwar10882 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: