IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5.5

The diagrams below gives information about the msnufscture of frozen fish pies. Summarise the informationand reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The diagrams below gives information about the msnufscture of frozen fish pies. Summarise the informationand reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
#diagrams #information #msnufscture #fish #pies #summarise #informationand #features #comparisons
The diagram shows the production process of salted fish cakes which could be warmed in an oven, in
fact
Add the comma(s)
,fact
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 the organic mixture is in a microwaveable container.
At
Change the preposition
In
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 the beginning, it is delivered the primary products,
such
 as fresh salmons and potatoes, even if they arrive in the industry
with
Change preposition
at
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a
Correct article usage
apply
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different
time
Fix the agreement mistake
times
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: the first ones are brought every 12 hours or less,
while
 the
second
 ones every
one
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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month. The fish is prepared in a different pale compared to vegetables.
Firstly
, the machine adds
to
Change preposition
apply
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salmon, lemon juice and salt; after two employees remove skin and bones and another one checks their work.
Secondly
, the haddock is mixed with peas and sauce,
worked
Correct pronoun usage
which worked
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 before.
In meanwhile
Change preposition
Meanwhile
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, the potatoes are cleared and peeled,
furthermore
 sliced and boiled. Chilli is added to them, for having a good taste.
After
this
 preparation,
the
Correct your spelling
they
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are
Change the verb form
is
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 rested on
the
Correct article usage
apply
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top of the organic mixture. The pie is wrapped and
also
 frozen,
thus
 it is ready to be sold in each market in the UK.

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Basic structure: Change the second paragraph.
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Basic structure: Change the fifth paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Only 5 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fifth paragraph.
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