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Writing Samples /
Band 5.5

The chart below gives information about the number of social networking sites people used in Canada in 2014 and 2015. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The chart below gives information about the number of social networking sites people used in Canada in 2014 and 2015. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
#information #sites #people #canada #summarise #features #comparisons
The bar chart gives information about
number
Change the article
a number
the number
show examples
 of (percentage of ?) people who used multiple social networking
sites
 in Canada in 2014 and
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
2015.
Overall
,
percentage
Correct article usage
the percentage
show examples
 of using one site in both years had the highest amount of usage.
Beside
Replace the word
Besides
show examples
 the least amount of people chose using 5
sites
. 22 % of people had tendencies using no
sites
 in 2014 and
this
 percentage was going up
only
Change preposition
by only
show examples
 1 % in 2015. Another
information
Correct quantifier usage
piece of information
show examples
 as we can see from the chart
that
Add a missing verb
is that
show examples
 there was only
2
Correct article usage
a 2
show examples
% differentiation between
who
Correct pronoun usage
those who
show examples
 used 5
sites
 and had the lowest part as
apposed
Correct your spelling
opposed
show examples
 to other
usages
Replace the word
users
show examples
. Using multiple
sites
 one to five was decreasing
among
Change preposition
over
show examples
 the years. There was a
slightly
Change the adverb
slight
show examples
 fall in
y axis
Add a hyphen
y-axis
show examples
.
Submitted by pink.emotionn on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 91%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words sites with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "gives" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "information" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "amount" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "information" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 3 times.
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