IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

The two pie charts show the percentages of pollutant entering a particular part of ocean in 1997 and 2007

The two pie charts show the percentages of pollutant entering a particular part of ocean in 1997 and 2007
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Linking Words
This
Correct determiner usage
These
show examples
 pie
charts
Fix the agreement mistake
chart
show examples
indictea
Correct your spelling
indicate
tge
Correct your spelling
the
 proportion of various
Use synonyms
pollutant
Fix the agreement mistake
pollutants
show examples
 which entered a special part of the
ocean
Use synonyms
 in the years
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
1997 and 2007.
Overall
Linking Words
, at the beginning of the
year
Use synonyms
,
Use synonyms
Add an article
a pollutant
show examples
pollutant
Fix the agreement mistake
pollutants
show examples
 from
air
Correct article usage
the air
show examples
 contributed
most
Correct article usage
the most
show examples
,
while
Linking Words
 little had
least
Change the article
the least
show examples
Use synonyms
pollutant
Fix the agreement mistake
pollutants
show examples
 that entering in the
ocean
Use synonyms
. In the comparison,
at the end
Linking Words
 of the
Use synonyms
year
Add a comma
,year
show examples
pollutant
Use synonyms
 from
air
Add an article
the air
show examples
 and domestic sewage was the largest segment
caused
Correct pronoun usage
that caused
show examples
 pollution in
Use synonyms
ocean
Add an article
the ocean
show examples
 and the lowest contribution was made up
by
Change preposition
of
show examples
 litter and farm waste. On having the look at the graph, it is seen from the graph that domestic sewage and offshore oil
enter
Replace the word
entry
show examples
in
Change preposition
into
show examples
Use synonyms
ocean
Correct article usage
the ocean
show examples
 increased significantly from 18% and 5% for the former
year
Use synonyms
 and 29% and 14% for the latter
year
Use synonyms
.
However
Linking Words
, in 1997 and 2007,
Use synonyms
Add an article
a pollutant
show examples
pollutant
Fix the agreement mistake
pollutants
show examples
 from
air
Correct article usage
the air
show examples
 polluted the largest segment of the
ocean
Use synonyms
accounted
Wrong verb form
accounting
show examples
 for 30% and drop slightly to 29
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
at the end
Linking Words
 of the
year
Use synonyms
. A similar
tend
Correct your spelling
trend
show examples
 was noticed in the case of industrial waste and marine where the figure decreased sharply
was
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
by 8% and 9%, over the given period. One more
Correct your spelling
noticeable
notable
noticable
Correct your spelling
noticeable
 feature of the chat is the percentage of farm water and litter
Use synonyms
pollutant
Fix the agreement mistake
pollutants
show examples
 added
in
Change preposition
to
show examples
Use synonyms
ocean
Add an article
the ocean
show examples
 which has decreased by almost 2% from 1997 to 2007

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "at the end".
▼
Introduction: The introduction is missing.
▼
Introduction: Change the first sentence in the introduction.
▼
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
▼
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words pollutant, ocean, year with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "graph" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "decreased" was used 2 times.
▼
What to do next:
Look at other essays: