IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5

High job demands, stress and sense of commitment are among the main reasons people go to work when they are ill. This way they accomplish important tasks, but may infect others or get some serious health problems themselves. In your opinion should people go to work if they are sick? Support your point of view with relevant examples from your knowledge or experience.

#job #demands #stress #sense #commitment #people #work #tasks #health #support #point
Since the beginning of time
,
Accept space
,
mankind has survived and its survival depends on the occupation and food. Back to back schedules
,
Accept space
,
 meetings and professional responsibilities compel a person to get up every morning and
work
, ignoring his/her health.In my opinion
,
Accept space
,
 people should not go to
work
 when they are not fit
physicaly
in accord with physical laws
physically
 or
mentaly
in your mind
mentally
.
This
 essay will discuss the cons of going to
work
 in bad health. The
first
 question a person should ask oneself is
,
Accept space
,
 Who will take care of my
body
 if not me?A human
body
 is like a live machine.
For instance
,
Accept space
,
 if
one
's
car check
Accept comma addition
car, check
 engine light is on, still he/she decide to drive it.It may take the load
one
 or two times
,
Accept space
,
 but if ignored and left
unrepaired
 on time, the car will be nothing, but a big box of metal.
Likewise
, if we don't give time to our
body
, our
body
 will give up on
ourself
Suggestion
our self
oneday
Suggestion
one day
.
Secondly
, in case
one
's disease is contagious
,
Accept space
,
 like
flu
Suggestion
the flu
 or cold etc.Going to
work
 in
such
 condition will spread it to colleagues and in consequence entire office or their family will end up catching the same disease. Some managers may believe that if
i
refers to the speaker or writer
I
 can
work
 anyone can
work
 in
minor
Suggestion
minority
 health issues,
this
 perception may result in lack of productivity. A task which could have been completed in 30
mintues
a written account of what transpired at a meeting
minutes
 will take an hour or
may be
by chance
maybe
 more.
Also there
Accept comma addition
Also, there
 is no
gurranty
give surety or assume responsibility
guarantee
guaranty
guarantees
 that the result will be error free, due to lack of concentration. In conclusion, to support it can
said
Suggestion
say
 that we have only
one
 life and
one
body
, but N number and types of jobs.
Therefore
, I believe that mental stress or job commitment should never
effect
have an effect upon
affect
 a human
body
.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
What to do next:
Look at other essays: