IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 2.5

Some people think that it is important to use leisure time for activities that develop the mind, such as reading and doing crossword puzzles. Others feel that it is important to give one’s mind a rest in leisure time. Discuss.

#people #leisure #time #activities #mind #crossword #puzzles #one’s #rest
As we are human we naturally need to rest
on
Suggestion
at
for
 leisure
time
 to recover
thestress
Suggestion
the stress
 of
work
 and everyday life. In fact, every individual need to do what they want and belong to them. Personally, I prefer to be active during
this
time
 because it
is feel
Suggestion
feels
 right to me better.
Moreover
, people are free for what they do
on
Suggestion
in
with
 their leisure
time
, and nobody can say what it is the best. Some people want to relax after their day of
work
. These people may prefer to relax by watching movies, reading or getting a massage. People who have a
physically
Suggestion
physical
jobs
Suggestion
job
such
 as doctors, teachers and builders may choose these types of activities. If you are a doctor, you may feel that you want to let your body rest after
work
 and you don’t want to do a five
kilometer
a metric unit of length equal to 1000 meters (or 0.621371 miles)
kilometre
 run after
work
, because you are already physically tired.
On the other hand
, some people choose to be active in their leisure
time
 because they do very sitting jobs.
For example
, these
people many
Accept comma addition
people, many
 spend all day sitting on a chair and do their
work
. At the end of a working day, they may
be have
behave in a certain manner; show a certain behavior; conduct or comport oneself
behave
 a backache, and all of their body become tired so they need to stretch their arms and improve their health by doing some activity
such
 as going to the gym or swimming.
Submitted by pa.atash68 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: