The charts below show what UK graduate and post graduate students who did not go into full-time work did after leaving college in 2008.

The charts below show what UK graduate and post graduate students who did not go into full-time work did after leaving college in 2008.
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The bar graph illustrates the profession of UK
graduate
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and
post
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postgraduate
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graduate
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students who did not undergo full-time employment during their
post college
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post-college
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period in the year 2008.
Overall
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, studying
further
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was most popular among UK
graduates
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as well as
Linking Words
postgraduates
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.
In contrast
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, engaging in volunteer
work
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was the field least chosen among both
the
Correct article usage
apply
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graduates
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.
Moreover
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, in total, the number of
graduates
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was almost 10 times more than the number of
postgraduates
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. A staggering 29,665
graduate
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students opted for
further
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studies,
whereas
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a meagre 3500
graduate
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students wanted to do voluntary
work
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.
Furthermore
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, the
amount
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number
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of
graduates
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doing part-time
work
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or unemployed remained almost the same at 17,735 and 16.325 respectively.
In addition
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, only 2725
postgraduates
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enrolled in
further
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studies, which is nearly 11 times less than the
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graduates
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graduate's
graduates'
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proportion.
Also
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noteworthy is the fact that a similar trend was seen in all the other fields
as well as
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only 2,535, 345, and 1625
postgraduates
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engaged in part-time
work
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, voluntary
work
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and unemployment respectively.

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "as well as, further".
Vocabulary: Replace the words graduate, graduates, postgraduates, work with synonyms.
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.
Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "almost" was used 2 times.
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