IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5.5

Some people with good education and experience in their field decide to move abroad to work. Why do you think that is? What problems does this cause?

#people #education #field #move #work
In today’s globalized world, people with skills and experiences in their own industry, tend to
move
 a foreign
country
 to
work
 in a good environment with better salaries. There lie several reasons behind their migration.
Firstly
, these days’, skilled people like to
work
 abroad either from their own interest or higher lifestyle. Many people dream to travel around the world since their childhood. After finishing their institutional learning, they find some way to
move
 abroad for a good career. They believe that foreign industry can provide not only a good
job but
Accept comma addition
job, but
also
 a better life. To illustrate
this
, I can present my brother as an example here, who graduated from Bangladesh and later migrated to France for working in a company that provided with better salaries than his own
country
 job. Most of the people
move
 to a foreign
land
 for an improved living condition. They may find their own
land
 not as comfortable as they are looking for. If they reside in their own
country
, they may not find those modern facilities that a foreign
country
 can offer. A study conducted by the Guardian showed that 60% of the highly
ambitious educated
Accept comma addition
ambitious, educated
 persons tend to leave their own
country
 and settle in a developed
country
 only for a higher lifestyle.
Besides
, in some cases,
this
 migration can result in adverse ways to a
country
. A
country
 can lose its human resources due to migration. An educated
person
 is regarded as an asset
for
Suggestion
in
 his own
country
. He can play a key role in the development of his own
country
 by contributing his expertise in his own preferred field. In my opinion, an experienced
person
 should dream to
work
 for his own nation rather than transferring his skills abroad. To sum up, an educated
person
 can definitely serve his
country
 with his skills. Every
person
 should contribute something for the betterment of his own
land
.
Although
 every
people
Suggestion
person
have
Suggestion
has
 a goal to lead a pleasant life, they should not
move
 abroad to
work
 and, they should do something
at
Suggestion
on
 their own
land
 using their experiences at the same time.
Submitted by import.relief100 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
What to do next:
Look at other essays: