Art is considered an essential part of all cultures through out the world. However, thses days fewer and fewer people appreciate art and turn focus to science, technology and business. At what extend you agree and disagree

#art #part #cultures #world #thses #people #focus #science #technology #business

It is true that

science

and

technology

, nowadays, have

benefitted

Suggestion

benefited

the whole world in all aspects.

Although

science

and

technology

have a greater impact on our lives, the role of artists is unforgettable, and they contribute

lot

Suggestion

a lot

in our

life

. There are many things that artists can tell us about

life

that

science

and

technology

failed to. To

commenced

Suggestion

commence

with, communication between people in every nation which is the language that they speak with each other. In fact, is a branch of art,

this

gives

people sense

Suggestion

a person's sense

person's sense

the person's sense

peoples' sense

of humanity, and

this

perhaps the only difference between human beings and animal.

Furthermore

, creative people can boost us emotionally and change our feelings.

For example

, lots of Beethovens fan

listen

Suggestion

listens

to his music pieces because they feel relieved and motivated, so music control our emotions and translates our feelings Another field in which we learn from art is related to culture and history. Many states show their history through a piece of painting or the way that people dance and wear, for the majority of people

this

is the sort of entertainment too, there are people who travel around the globe to visit historical places and art galleries.

By contrast

this

is not the case when

science

and

technology

are considered as they all about

practical

Suggestion

practice

and

physical aspect

Suggestion

physical aspects

the physical aspect

and do not

contribute our lives

Suggestion

contribute to our lives

emotionally and socially. To conclude, there is no denying the fact that

science

and

technology

have great value in our

life

However

, artists can teach people about many aspects of their

life

that the former cannot.

Mon Jan 20 2020

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Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

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Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

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Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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6Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

259 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.5

Complete response

5.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Art is considered an essential part of all cultures through out the world. However, thses days fewer and fewer people appreciate art and turn focus to science, technology and business. At what extend you agree and disagree

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Some people think that parents should encourage their children to take part in organised group activities in their free time. Others say that is important for children to learn how to occupy themselves on their own. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

In many countries, the number of animals and plants is declining. Why do you think this is happening? How can this issue be solved?

High stakes english language tests such as IELTS, are being increasingly delivered on the computers. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

Many elderly people are no long looked after by thier families but are put in care home or nusring homes.what are advantages and disadvantes of this trend?

It is better for the students to live away from the home during their university studies rather than staying with their parents. To what extent do you agree or disagree?