More people decided to have children in their later age than in the past. Why? Do advantages of this outweigh disadvantages?

I strongly believe that
school
should teach their students to manage their
money
as early as possible. There are two main reasons behind
this
and there are reasons and example to support it. These two areas are bad spending
behavior
manner of acting or controlling yourself
behaviour
and the future demand urgency. Children are unable to manage their funds wisely without any guidance from their closest environment,
school
. Most children
would probably spent
Suggestion
would probably spend
their
money
based on what they want.
Consequently
, a child that
have been given
Suggestion
has been given
a pocket
money
for
school
may spend it all on junk food. As a
results
Suggestion
result
, it leads to bad eating habits, obesity or consumerism. Teachers
could avoids
Suggestion
could avoid
these
denotes a person or thing
this
by only provide healthy food at
school
environment
for example
.
On the other hand
, the challenge ahead for these children is more difficult than their older generations. The cost of education is increasing steeply from time to time. My university fees ten years
ago
Accept comma addition
ago, for
for
example is
Suggestion
example, were
example were
fifty percent cheaper than fees coming from the same university. Despite the parent’s financial support, children could only continue their education by scholarships or taking loans from the bank. Teaching them the value of
money
in
school
Accept comma addition
school, however
however
may
also
give a bad influence to children. In spite of their success in managing their
finance
Suggestion
finances
, they may never want to do or appreciate something if there is no
money
involved
on
Suggestion
in
with
it.
This
of course could be
balance
Suggestion
balanced
by teaching children other values in life more important than
money
. In summary, the two main reasons on how the children spent their
money
and the urgency to prepare for future challenge have
outweigh
Suggestion
outweighed
the bad influence the bad influence of teaching financial management in
school
.
Therefore it
Accept comma addition
Therefore, it
is suggested to schools to keep an eye on these points for the goods of their children.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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