IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

You should spend about 20 minutes on this task. You are a current student of Loren Brusque University, studying Business Administration. You want to apply for the post of Quality Assurance Manager you have recently seen on the university's notice board. Write a letter to Mr. Walker, and Give your reason for writing Tell about your education Describe your work experience and explain why you would be suitable for the job. Write at least 150 words.

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Dear
Mr.
Change the punctuation
Mr

The abbreviated title Mr. seems to be punctuated incorrectly. Consider changing the punctuation.

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Walker Here is Asma, a current student of Business administration at Loren Brusque University. I'm writing a letter because of the Announcement I've seen early
This
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

 morning on The University's Notice Bored, after having seen your advertisement about The Quality Assurance Manager, I would like to apply for it. I will finish my Master year of
This
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

 Major
this
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

 semester, only after submitting a graduation project. The
Main
Correct your spelling
main

The word Main doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

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 reason why I'm confident about my abilities to do just great in the job is
because
Replace the word
that

It appears that the conjunction because is the wrong word choice after reason is. Consider changing it to that or rewriting the sentence.

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, as well as my study and Marks are successful, I've been
also
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

 doing a part-time job, where I teach some of the new students who share the same major as me, which helped me to get a clear Background of
these kind
Change the determiner
this kind
these kinds

It appears that the plural demonstrative these is modifying the singular noun kind. Consider using a singular demonstrative or a plural noun instead.

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 of works, having enough Experience with managing many different factors at the same time.  Having a good Leadership, social and Honest Persona added points to me, which I Believe fits The Vacancy pretty well.
Lastly
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, I would deeply appreciate it if you choose me for
this
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

 great job, I can't wait to hear from you and attend the Interview, Please contact me if you need any more information, Thank you. WhatsApp: 0555555555

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The Closing

The style of the letter determine how you have to close it.

Check out the suggested closing sentences for each type of letter in the General IELTS Test. The closing sentence should be the last sentence of your letter.

Formal style (To someone you have not met, whose name you don’t know)

  • Yours faithfully,

Semi-formal (To someone you may or may not have met, whose last name you know)

  • Yours sincerely,

Informal (To someone you know well, whose first name you know and use)

  • Best regards,
  • Warm wishes,

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