You are looking for a part-time job. Write a letter to an employment agency. In your letter: introduce yourself explain what sort of job you would like say what experience and skills you have

Dear Sir or Madam, My name is Laura Green. I am pursuing my master in
computer
Add an article
the computer

The noun phrase computer system seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

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system
Fix the agreement mistake
systems

It seems that system may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

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from
university
Correct article usage
the university

Your article usage with the geographic name university of Toronto may be incorrect.

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of Toronto. I would like to explore
part-time
Correct article usage
a part-time

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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opportunity
Fix the agreement mistake
opportunities

It seems that opportunity may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

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belong side with completing my degree. My interest is in
data
, so my inclination would be towards it. Analyzing the
data
and providing the forecast review or predicting the major problem area. Apart from
data
Add a comma
,data

It appears that you are missing a comma after the introductory phrase Apart from data. Consider adding a comma.

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I would like to work as
field
Correct article usage
a field

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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human resource representative whose main responsibility is to assist new joiners and take organize companies events. Prior
enrolling
Change preposition
to enrolling

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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in a university for
masters
Correct article usage
a masters

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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program, I use to work with Amazon as
data
Add an article
a data

The noun phrase data analyst seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

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analyst. Analyzing
data
and providing the forecast, strategizing the solution based on the
data
collected is one of my
forte
Change to a plural noun
fortes

The singular countable noun forte follows the quantifier one of, which requires a plural noun. Consider using a plural noun or a different quantifier.

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. Volunteered in organizing several companies events. Kindly let me know if you come across a suitable job opportunity will be looking forward to
hear
Change the verb form
hearing

The verb hear is usually in the gerund form when following the word looking forward to. Consider replacing it with the -ing form.

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from you.
Correct the word
Yours

It appears that the word Your is not the correct form of the possessive pronoun. Consider changing it.

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Your
Correct your spelling
Yours

The word Your doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

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faithfully, Laura Green
Submitted by waghmaremamta04 on

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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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