In many countries people tend to move overseas or move to a different part of their country after their retirement. Discuss why it is so and the outcomes of this situation. Provide specific reasons and examples to support your opinion

#countries #people #move #part #country #retirement #outcomes #situation #support

In today’s world, retired citizens are love to move away from home to live an affordable and healthy life. In many countries, citizens

are wants

Suggestion

are wanting

want

to go foreign

country

or another section of their own

country

afterward their retirement. In

this

essay we will discuss the reasons for the migration as well as the result of

this

decisions

Suggestion

decision

. After retirement (end of job days), older people have enough time to think about their living so that they move to other cities or abroad to explore and travel different places which they could not able to do because of their tight working schedule.

In addition

, they

also

eager to secure their living by moving to low expensive place to live.

Moreover

, as we get older, better health care is needed with reasonable cost. They

also

choose the city outskirts or

country

side (countryside) to avoid

big cities hustle

Suggestion

the big city's hustle

big city's hustle

big city hustle

(the big city hustle) and pollution.

For example

, Ecuador, Panama and Mexico etc.

are

Suggestion

Are

some countries with lower (lowest) cost of accommodation, beautiful and diverse landscape, perfect climate and good medical services. Admittedly, people who change of their place to (in

Suggestion

) external

country

or another city after retirement have access to fresh food, vegetables and less pollution.

Additionally

, they tend to live happily because of better weather and hospital support with low priced service. They

also

change their location for the support they need like social support can prevent them from slipping into depression. Overall, elderly persons leave their home

country

or go to

country side

Suggestion

the country side

for many causes.

Moreover

, their life after working for

others create

Accept comma addition

others, create

a new chapter, which is

change

Suggestion

changing

the way of their hectic life. So, I strongly agree that retirees should relocate their places in order to live a high quality and virtuous livelihood.

Submitted by mahabub.karim21 on Sat Feb 01 2020

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Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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6Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

297 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.5

Complete response

6.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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In many countries people tend to move overseas or move to a different part of their country after their retirement. Discuss why it is so and the outcomes of this situation. Provide specific reasons and examples to support your opinion

Fully explain your ideas

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The rise of social media has affected personal relationships and society as a whole. Do the advantages of using social media for communication outweight the disadvantage?

New Technologies change the way children spend their free time. Do the advantages of these changes outweigh the disadvantages?

In the future all cars, buses and trucks will be driverless. The only people travelling inside these vehicles will be passengers. Do you think the advantages of driverless vehicles outweigh the disadvantages?